A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am wondering how to keep things interesting in a long distance relationship. I made a great connection with a man who has shared interests which started out as us just following each other to eventually realising we had a lot in common to talking every day and planning to meet when restrictions are lifted. We really like each other but I want to make sure he doesn't get bored of me in the meantime. It seems it will be a while until we meet and there's only so much we can say in texts til it becomes repetitive as far as talking about being with each other intimately. It's getting me down that there's no way we can see each other even though we really want to. I've never met anyone online it just happened naturally and was a really nice surprise. He's not creepy or strange and is very respectful and never pushed me to share anything with him that I didn't want to.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 February 2021):
 Keep sex and "sexy" stuff out of the picture until you can spend time together AFTER you have gotten to know him better IN PERSON.
Arrange a Date over Skype or Facetime (whatever video chat app you two have).
If you are into movies or books, "watch" a movie together and talk about it, ditto for books.
Try and make a little movie (if you can film & edit) with your phone (not so hard my teens do it all the time) of you day. Show him your house, take him for a walk of your neighborhood or your favorite park, stores etc.
We had an exchange student last year and my daughters and her send each other videos ALL the time of stuff they do - we went to the lake to film all the snow and ice. We did a little video of my youngest driving (she has her permit now) of them cooking dinner, doing Karaoke, dancing etc. And every other weekend we have a "presentation" we each have to pick a topic and make a power point presentation. The funnier the better :)
So there are plenty of ways you can SHOW of your sense of humor, wit, your personality.
It's not hard to flash some boobs, but really? Is that how you think you will be more "interesting"?
You say you made a connection because you have things in common - that means you have a lot to share. Just be creative in HOW you share. And I GET that you want him to "want" you - but stick to TRYING to keep sex out of it for now.
And take things slow. With an LDR there has to be some common sense used.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2021): If you're keen to meet him and happy to wait until you do so, why do you think you have to keep him entertained until then?
Does he feel that he has to perform in any way to keep you interested? It sounds as if your interest isn't going to wane while you wait, so why would his?
Trust in your worth and in his willingness to wait to meet you.
If you're sharing sexual things online, I would really advise against that. You feel you know him and maybe you do know him pretty well, but you've no idea how this will pan out and you do not know how he will treat any pictures or sexual talk between you if you do not work out. Or even if you do.
Including men I have gone out with for months, I will not send pictures of my naked body to anyone or sext with anyone! Do you ever wonder if he shows the things you say or your pictures with anyone? He might be unable to keep it to himself and end up showing his friends. Once it's out there, you are no longer in control.
Wise Owl once wrote a wonderful phrase and I loved it. He said something along the lines of 'You are not a circus pony required to perform.'
Your post smacks of panic and I fear you may come across as too desperate to please. You don't know him. In person, his physical presence may repulse you. And then he will be in ownership of pictures or sexual talk that should only be shared in person once a trusting relationship has been formed.
Slow down and stop panicking. If it's meant to happen, nothing will stop it. If it's not to meant to happen, nothing will make it.
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