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How to deal with a jealous friend when our husbands work together?

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Question - (1 October 2023) 1 Answers - (Newest, 2 October 2023)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

A couple of years ago I met the wife of one of my husbands colleagues and we hit it off and started hanging around with each other- drinks, cinema, dinner etc….

Unfortunately she seems a little jealous of the fact that I hang out with other friends and seems to only really like it when I’m just with her….

She does have family and friends that she hangs out with, without me so it’s not as if she is lonely.

On a few occasions she’s made it known that she has felt left out when I’ve gone out without her- one time it was a work doo (not even partners were invited) but she couldnt seem to understand that, another time it was with my friend’s baby shower - she doesn’t know my friend so I couldn’t invite her to it.

Another time I had gone to a spa day with my cousin as it was a birthday present her husband had got her and my friend said she could have tagged along and paid for herself. She has no boundaries!

She is a really nice woman so I don’t want to distance myself from her too much but I don’t like the fact she has to get moody each time I do something without her! I mean we are both in our 30’s we aren’t kids! I never say anything when she does things without me!

Anytime I post something on Facebook that doesn’t include her, I now have to actually block her from seeing it or she just whines about it.

I spoke to my husband about it and he asked me not to make a big deal of it as he has to work with her husband and doesn’t want to make things awkward- which I understand.

I’ve never had a friend like this so not really sure how to handle the situation without making it awkward, especially for my husband…

View related questions: cousin, facebook, jealous

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (2 October 2023):

Honeypie agony auntPersonally, I wouldn't want to deal with this.

You are no longer in high school and you DO NOT OWE her your every waking moment.

I get that your husband doesn't want to rock the boat, but HE doesn't have to deal with her, YOU do!

Again, I can only speak for myself, but... I'd be too busy to socialize with someone who throws darn near tantrums when I spend time with other people. That is a TOTAL no-go.

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