A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I have been going out for 4.5 years. He lived with me for a while and recently I just couldn't take the lies and shadyness so I told him to take his stuff and leave. I told him I couldn't take it anymore. The next day we spoke, I told him how I felt and he seemed fine and told me he didn't want to lose me as a girlfriend and that he would still be my boyfriend. I asked him if he wants to date other people and quickly he jumped and said NO NOT AT ALL. He found his own place now and we are rarely talking. Its not that I want him to text me all the time but I just want him to appreciate what he had more (i guess it will take time). I'll give him the benefit of the doubt with settling in and hanging with his friends but It's not like I was ever preventing him from doing that. I guess he just needs freedom. I just get worried and think stuff because hes not around. Basically I just want to see him make the move. I miss him and love him a lot but once again he just needs to get his stuff together. We've been thru so much together and I even stayed with him while he was in the Marines. We wrote letters to each other every day. This just goes to show you how much commitment we both had to this relationship.How do you think I should be acting? Does he really really care and hes just finding himself now? I wont give in to him and keep bugging him, I want him to have his space but I just don't want him to forget me and brush me off. I don't want their to be a void.Please Help
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (5 December 2010):
If you aren't able to live together what sort of future do you have? Do think you will be able to live together some time in the future? Have you at all talked to him about this?
How often did you communicate before he moved in with you? If there's a void you need to TALK TO HIM. Don't be stubborn, and don't play games of who's going to call first... If you care about him why are you scared of coming out in the open about it, give him a call, tell him how it is, ask to meet up and do something together as a couple.
Although, if he has withdrawn, it could be the relationship is in essence over and he didn't have the courage to admit that to you earlier. But you wont know without talking to him.
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