A
female
age
36-40,
*andygurl
writes:I have a homegurl who I call my sister. I knew her for years but we are so different, from the way we dress, to the guys we meet and date. I'm pregnant now and she claims to be the god mother and suppose to be the host of my babyshower. She hasn't once brought anything for the shower or put up any money for it. She gets mad when I tell her my other homegirl is going to be a host too. I just hope it doesn't cause any conflict between them to.What should I do. Then another thing I am so ready to get my own place and start this new life with me and my daughter but right now I'm not finacially set to move on my own. Now I still go look at apartments and stuff to weight out my options. I have always been the independent and well with money or getting money unlike my sister. My sister is the type who brags about having dis or can get dat which isn't true at all she always depended on other people. She wants us to get a place together at 1st I was against it but now because of my situation I'm becoming desperate. When we went to look at apartments she was so choses about what to get. She didn't like none of the 2 bedroom apartments only the townhouses which was kinda out of leaque well hers anyway. She got mad when I would ask to look at a one bedroom apartment. I feel like if we move together our friendship going to end very badly. What should I do
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female
reader, shapoopsy +, writes (27 September 2010):
 Hi Candygurl, it sounds like there are some interesting dynamics between you and your sis. Sometimes, friends do part and it's okay, but you may want to talk with her first. There could be a good deal of secret resentment forming. She might surprise you with her take on matters if you talk and listen. For example: Typically, the host of a baby shower has it at their place and there are not two hosts. Also, they provide for everything too. She might be feeling frustrated that you have invited another host into the matter, which could cause her to back off. At the end of the day, the shower is about you and baby. It should be peaceful, well-planned, and fun. I recommend asking one responsible person to take over the matter. (Usually, mom is not involved in planning the shower and you seem too involved. It is a gift to you!)Moving in together could be fatal to your friendship, but it's already on the rocks. Given what you have said about her behaviors and the way you speak about your friend, it would be a very good idea to sit down and have a heart-to-heart with her right away. Good luck! ~Shapoopsy
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