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How to approach my threesome fantasy again without seeming pushy?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Marriage problems, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 February 2010) 9 Answers - (Newest, 22 May 2010)
A male United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

dear cupid

i have a fantasy having a threesome with my wife i spoke to her and she willing to do but she hasnt mentioned it again how can i approach the subject again without it looking im pushing the subject ?????

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A female reader, Blondiebrooke69 United States +, writes (22 May 2010):

I think these people are crazy just make sure she knows shes better at it then the other woman and have fun...

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2010):

Definitely go for it dude... I think the best way to approach this is to make your wife feel like the 3some is for her (not you), or thats its about your adventures as a couple together. Don't make it solely about you.

The key is to build up to it... really sexualize your relationship, talk about all types of sex and really learn how to turn on your wife all the time...

For example, you could watch FFM 3some porn while your having sex, without even bringing up the subject.

Talk to your wife about lots of sexual fantasies that involve just you and her... make her feel like she is a sex goddess, get her turned on all the time... e.g. next time your out in resturant or pub, get her turned on and then ask her to go take off her panties and bring the back to you...

If you have a very healthy and fulfilling sex life together like this, then sometime you are watching porn and she is really turned on... bring the subject up, make it sound like its something you want to do as a couple. That it is as much about her as it is you.

Dont forget quite a few women are bi-curious, maybe she would love to try it, but the only thing stopping her would be that she needs to feel secure enough in your own relationship. She needs to know that the 3some is not just about you wanting another woman.

She has already said she would like to try it... so the thought is there. So build up to it the right way and you'll be having 3some fun before you know it! lucky dude!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2010):

Honestly, your a fool if you go ahead with this idea. What man doesn't fantasize about a threesome? But the difference is, mist men realise it's signing a death warrant to their marriage if they do it. If you don't love tour wife go ahead but if you do just be aware it will come bbl to haunt you regardless of what she says now.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2010):

although its a very popular fantasy, i would leave it in the realm of fantasy if i were you. unless of course you have a rock solid relationship, which i doubt very much seeing as your on here asking advice instead of asking your wife.

if its to involve another man, would you really not wonder if she found him a better sex partner than you, vice versa for your wife if it involves another woman.

listen to the people on here, or you may just end up with nothing.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2010):

Dude. Stop. Trust me... stop. Leave this as a fantasy, nothing more. As others have written this won't end well.

If you end up MMF and you watch her moan and scream with pleasure while another guy pounds on her you won't be able to deal with it. Vice versa... if you end up MFF and she has to watch you enjoy another woman's body then she will likely resent you too. It is a rare couple that can handle a threesome without nasty fallout.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2010):

Miamine agony auntIf you and your wife are not totally comfortable being able to discuss sex, then your definitely not ready for a threesome fantasy. If your embarrassed just to ask her, how do you think your going to feel the morning after when you start wondering if she still loves you, because she enjoyed screwing the other person so much. You need to have a very strong relationship and be able to talk honestly about anything before you consider doing such adventurous sexual practice.

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2010):

Miamine agony auntYou'd be an idiot to try this threesome thing.. it usually ends in tears.. after sharing your wife, she will look at you differently and you'll look at her differently. Unless you know what your doing, threesomes often end in divorce.

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A female reader, Angzw Zimbabwe +, writes (24 February 2010):

It depends what ratio you are talking about. If its MMF maybe she doesn't want to look pushy either. If its MFF then maybe since its your fantasy she is waiting for you to bring it up. Be sure she wholeheartedly agrees with this because your fantasy could end up a nightmare if she is being pushed into it.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2010):

I'm not sure she does want to do it. Maybe leave it as a fantasy.

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