A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello there! My ex had commitment issues and couldn't handle our relationship. He asked to still be friends but he only wanted a friends with benefits deal, which made me angry. So after that, whenever he called or texted me, I didnt reply.I have given him so many chances in the past and I'm finally done with him. Its almost time to go back to school and I know I will run into him. He will probably give me a hug like he always does and ask me why I have been ignoring him. What should I say? Should I tell him how I feel, that he's a big jerk and I dont want to talk to him anymore? Should I just pretend I dont see him? Thanks for the advice!
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female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (1 January 2009):
 My advice is to not make a scene by calling him a jerk. It makes you sound like you still like him and are still upset about it and makes you seem like the immature one. When you are mad about something it means you still care about it. Don't ignore him completely either. That makes you look immature also to just act like you didn't see someone when you have dated him. Just say hello. If he asks why you have been ignoring him just say "Well you remember, I'm not into friends with benefits. Besides I've been really busy. Nice seeing you again though, talk to you later." Be really nonchalant and non caring. Most likely it will make him crazy at how you can just ignore him and not care anymore. He seems like the type who thinks you will be into him forever. But continue to ignore him as you are much better off. I congratulate you for being strong enough to ignore him so far, it's a very hard thing to do! Good luck with everything.
A
male
reader, roadman  +, writes (1 January 2009):
 tell him how you feel...there not much more you can really do,putting the blind folds on,not really the way to deal with any problem.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (31 December 2008):
 Good for you. It is always better to be bluntly honest in this situation. Tell him you are looking for more and it doesn't help to be seen hugging him on campus. Something like, "yes we had a good thing, but you weren't taking me where I want to be, I need to get on with my life without entanglements." If he says he can change, tell him that the time for changing has passed. (It is not likely that he will make a real long term change). Don't call him names or get excited just calmly tell him no. Don't give him hope for a reuniting.
I had a girl do this to me way back when . . . and it allowed me to move on, gave me closure. Although it seems cold it really is the kindest thing.
FA
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A
male
reader, okiefun48 +, writes (31 December 2008):
he is a user girl be total done with him and move on good luck to you
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