A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes:How should I handle this situation with these girls?So I recently got a new job and the girls I started with dont really talk to me and aren't friends with me like they are with each other.Today one of them started talking to me about relationships and she wanted to see a picture of a guy I'm dating and they said he's hot.One of the girls I was close with but after she saw the picture she's been weird with me and don't speak to me much anymore. Today I said bye to her and when I closed the door I hear them laughing realty loudly.:(I tend to keep to myself and just do my work.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (29 June 2013):
 Stay friendly, smile, be courteous, do favors when you can but only when you can, but keep your private life private. It is sheer hell going to a job you dread everyday. I know, I only stayed at it for two months then quit. I loved all my other jobs but my "work me" is decided different from my "at home me" and I keep it that way.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2013): I think you have fallen into the trap of assuming that they were laughing at you, when there is a whole host of reasons completely unconnected you with you which may have been making them laugh. You are thinking negatively, which makes you feel negatively, and will impact on how you act around them, only compounding the problem.If you are planning on staying in this job then you need to work on improving your relationships. Working with groups of women can be difficult, with problems you rarely get when working in a mixed sex environment. Why not take the focus of you and ask them about their lives. Be cheerful, light and complimentary, as this is always well received and can be contagious.Think of this. A woman is walking in the high street and spots an old friend at some distance walking towards her, they make brief eye contact, and the woman smiles at her old friend. The friend however changes direction and darts into the nearest shop. The woman thinks, "why did she do that? Why didn't she want to see me? What have I done? she questions herself. She then feels rejected, insulted and negative. This is then reflected in the way she acts as she continues her day, and she decides that next time she sees this friend that she will snub her also. But the truth is, the old friend had received some bad news, she had to pop to the shop to collect something but was so lost in her own world that she had not noticed the shop until she was almost on it, she certainly did not notice her old friend. How lovely it would have been to have been approached by an old friend, or to receive a phone call when she arrived home from this old friend saying "I saw you in the high street today...you looked so distracted..I am worried about you, are you ok? How about a chat over coffee. This creates a good positive feel from exactly the same situation.Try to move away from negative assumptions...they create negativity, you are obviously conscientious...that makes for good relationships.
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