A
male
age
30-35,
*irgin89
writes:I've known my gf now for over 2 going on 3 years and we've been dating for going on 2, and i'm so in love with her and she feels the same for me. High school sweethearts, planning to get married the whole 9 yards. Well on problem...her mother doesn't agree with us dating for lots of reasons, some being i hurt her daughter, disrespected the family, used their family, lied to their family, and talked down about their family at one point early early on in our relationship. I suffer from a mood disorder bipolar, and i wasn't taking my medication, or heck at that time i hadn't even seen a doctor for it and we didn't know what it was and i was a royal dick to everyone, and now i have that part of me under control.I've changed a lot, and my family and my g/f see that, but her parents and family don't see it, because they won't see me, don't want me around, don't want anything to do with me, and it's really hurting my g/f's relationship with her family, and she's desperately wanting it back. The only way it seems, is to not date me anymore, but we want to be together.So how should i go about appologizing to her parents in the most formal religious (we're both catholic) respectful way possible without being able to see them in person? Pplease help.I went on a camping trip this weekend without her and only got to talk to her a little bit, and it felt like a huge part of me was missing, like we had broken up or something, and i don't think i can handle that..i'll take any and all advice from anyone.. thank you and God Bless. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): I agree that maybe a letter might be the way to go since they won't see you in person. You must remember that they may be able to forgive you, but I think it is difficult for parents to trust again when their daughter has been hurt in any way. Even though your gf is o.k. with everything, it may take the parents awhile. If you love her as you say, be patient and let her know you are trying your best. Try hard to be understanding and kind regarding her parents because she loves them and wants them in her life. Try not to speak ill of them even if you are frustrated. Hopefully, in time they will come around. Meanwhile...make sure your gf really sees that you are making an effort.
A
female
reader, :):):)  +, writes (26 May 2008):
As a catholic family I would have thought they been able to forgive you, but it seems they are still hurt with what you have said.
I have a friend with bipolar disorder and understand what a difficult illness it can be.
If they refuse to see you in person, writing them a letter may be a good way of apologising and explaining. Tell them that you were ill, that your sorry and that you love their daughter. Even sending them flowers or a card might ease the rift.
Good luck
xxx
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