A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am going to see a show in a theatre soon.I sort of know one of the actors in it.We have never met in person, we have just spoke online a little bit.He is on a social networking site.I was wondering whether to ask him if he'd like to meet at the stage door after the show,by contacting him on the website, or whether i should just go round there and wait without mentioning it, or whether i should ask him if he wants to meet in the bar in the theatre after the show, if it's still open.Or i could tell him i will be in the bar and leave it up to him as to whether he wants to meet there or not.He isn't very well known,he has done some tv work.However, a member of his family is quite well known,they are both British, but i've heard that they both like to be treated in a down to earth way, and not like a celebrity.I don't like to treat actors any different to anyone else, and i know that i wouldn't want to be treated that way either, so by meeting him, i'd like to treat him as a friend.He may not want to meet since he doesn't know me in person, or because he may want to get straight back to the hotel, but if i don't ask, i'll never know.Of course, if i did ask i would ask in the most polite way possible.He is the same age as me.I know he has been on the website while he has been touring as he posted updates.I'm not sure yet whether i will be taking a friend with me or one of my parents,so they would be with me when i meet him,I suppose i could mention that too.I was going to go to another event he did a while ago, but i couldn't make it, and he told me there would be other opportunities to meet.Unless he was just saying that just to be polite, or he might have meant it.I have met people who are strangers before, only we were both fans of an artist and we met at there concerts before and after the show.I'm also wondering whether to put my mobile phone number on the message,then he can contact me while i am at the theatre when the show has finished if he wants to ?.He might only want to decide on the night whether he wants to meet or not.I dont like to say this really,but if i go with my dad,i will be worried about him showing me up lol sometimes he does.My mum can't make it and i'm not sure if my friends can yet.Any suggestions on how i could ask him ?. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2009): Lol i've just heard that there is going to be an after show party on the first night for the cast and members of the public in a nearby bar !.I'm going on the second night !.Bad timing.
I'm wondering whether to also add that i'm disappointed i will miss the party, if i write to him ?.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2009): Hi.I know he might say he is going to meet and then he wont,but thats a risk i'll just have to take.If i don't ask,i won't know.I was thinking of telling him which night i am seeing the show,and that i will be with my friend,then say "we will either be in the bar in the theatre, if it's open afterwards, or a bar which is close to the theatre after the show, and you are welcome to come and join us if you like.It would be nice to meet you ". Then add my phone number and say that he can contact me that way on the night if he wants to make arrangements.So i am giving him the option,rather than actually asking him.Plus it means i will be having a drink with my friend anyway so it doesnt matter if he turns up or not.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2009): Why not just contact him via the site and say it would be nice to meet up and see what he suggests. You're busy looking at what might happen but people rarely do or say what you expect.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): Emilysanswers,thats exactly what i thought !.I thought that if i just turn up at the stage door without telling him,or even if i do tell him, i would look more like a groupie and it would seem like i am treating him like a celebrity ( which he isn't ,yet ),whereas if we met in the bar,it would be more like i am treating him as a friend.I'm not sure if the bar is open after the show.I'll have to find out.Plus i thought it would be more relaxing,especially for him since he will have just finished work,if we sat and had a drink,and we can talk better.
Do you think i should ask him to meet in the bar,or just say that i will be in the bar with my friend and he can come and join us if he feels like doing so ?.I'd like to give him my mobile number just so that he can contact me while we are in the theatre,as obviously we won't have access to the internet then.He could text me after the show to say whether he will meet or not.
I'd like to add that he is in his twenties like i am,so it's not like he is someone much older or anything.
I'm not sure if any of my friends can go yet.If they do my dad will still have to pick us up really,as the last train is soon after the show finishes,so i wouldn't have time to hang around.And i can't drive and a taxi would be too expensive.It's about 40 mins away from where i live.I'd probably have to get intouch with my dad when we are ready for coming home,,and he'd have to be able to find somewhere to park.When i have been to the that theatre in the past,he has gone to a shopping centre nearby which is open till late,so maybe he could do that again.Whereas if he had been going to the show with me he could have parked on the car park near the theatre.The thing is though,no offense to him or anything, i would feel better if he wasn't there.You know how people can feel about their parents lol.He would have enjoyed the show though.
I definetly wouldn't do more that kiss this actor,i'm not even sure if a kiss would happen lol !.He is attractive though : )
Something will get sorted anyway.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (6 June 2009):
If you are going with a friend (NOT YOUR DAD) and you have spoken to him before online then just tell him it would be nice to meet up with him afterwards and give him your phone number. Tell him you'll hang around in the bar for a while after, and then will be moving on.
Don't hang around outside the stage door like a groupie.
Keep it casual. You are meeting him after he finishes work.
Be aware that he may be a complete arse who thinks you are a fan up for a bit of fun for a night so if you want him as more than a one night stand do NOT sleep with him or go back to his place.
Stick with your friends and have fun in pubs and bars. If he wants to see you again at the end of the night he can ask you out.
If you do any more than a bit of a kiss with him then you'll never hear from him again.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): Yes i have spoken to him before,and once i missed another event of his and he told me there would be other opportunities to meet up.
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (6 June 2009):
 Have you spoken to him before? Sounds like you're a crazy fan so I wouldn't try to meet up with him! X
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