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age
41-50,
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writes: I have had about 6 boyfriends(apart from the current one), from the time i was 16 till now (am 31), and of the six, five of them had "defects" i couldnt imagine myslef leaving with. This ranged from low self esteem to violence. I have always dreamt of having a 'close to perfect' man. Now am seeing a guy who is close to perfection, except for one thing that i dont like, he is always too busy for my liking. I like to spend quality time with my man, but this one always has a pile of things to do, some real, some made up. We have had disussions and arguments over the same but things dont seem to work. it appears i may have to live with it, but am not happy. Should i find someone else? Or just accept the fact that whoever i find will still not be perfect so i might as well stick to this one?
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self esteem, violent Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): If in doubt, don't stay with him. Marriage won't make your problems better, it will make them worse. It is the rest of your life we're talking about here.
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 If you got to ask, it ain't the right one.
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A
female
reader, Share Bear  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 How would you feel if your partner proposed to you in a speech that ended; so... "I might as well stick to this one"?
I don't think that's any good sentiment to build a marriage on. But that's not to say you need to give up on the relationship altogether. Things may change, or your own outlook may even change. Have a good think through your options before you jump, or on the flipside certainly don't agree to marry until you're sure.
Above all- when it's right- you just know. So if you could leave someone tomorrow, it probably isn't right for you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the adivice, am still abit unsure of which way to go though...
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A
male
reader, Honest Answer  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 Perfert is a powerful word. If you cut the field to just perfect men, you might end up alone. Instead of perfect how about these qualities:
Someone that would never ever raise a hand to you.
Someone that love you and respects you.
Someone that wants to grow old with you.
Someone that has the same outlook on life.
Everything else is what makes a relationship exciting, fresh, and new. Grow together.
Good Luck,
Jeff
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