A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok ive been with my boyfriend for five months and hes been my best friend for ages.Im a virgin but Im sure that i want to have sex with him but im slightly nerous about two things.The first is how much pain it will cause me.From experience how bad is it?and is there anyway to relieve it?also i am sort of worried about ending up pregnant.I want more than a condom but i really dont want to go and ask my doctor for the pill,Is there any way round this?thanks! :]
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female
reader, aunty_rach +, writes (22 January 2009):
the pain is almost like you feel like your vaginal entrance has been torn abit. it really stings and is pretty unpleasant. but don't worry it is very normal. it almost feels like a stinging burning sensation. it does go off abit the more he SLOWLY thrusts. maybe ask him not to go the whole way in on your first time. also if the pain gets too much ask him to stop.
you will probably hurt a little the next day. nothing as painful as when you first have sex though. it will just sting when you sit down or move alot. that wears off pretty quick. also don't worry if you bleed a little bit. it's a tiny amount and also you may still have a little blood the next day. it does not mean you have been bleeding the whole time, it may just be when you go to the loo or something. also the first time peeing after sex hurts a little too. stings again. sorry this must sound awful, but don't worry it all goes off and sex gets much better! maybe try using a toy or something to stretch yourself a little before you have sex? i've done this after my first time and i believe it has helped alot. as sex is very enjoyable now.
if you also feel a little ill after your first time don't worry, i think your body just goes into slight shock. just sit down and have a glass of water or whatever and you will feel much better.
i wish i knew all of this when it was my first time, as i thought the bleeding was from where he teared me or something awful. i paniced abit and that probably made me feel abit faint. but then i realised it was nothing and i was fine. the next day i also felt like i had slight stomache cramps, kinda like when you are about to start your period. that also wore off.
i hope i have helped a little. don't worry about any of it. the first time is never going to be pleasant. just make him so slow and use extra lube if it helps.
A
female
reader, shna  +, writes (22 January 2009):
 the pain is something you cant describe im not tryin to scare you but its a pain you wont have felt before . it basically just a pain anwhen the penise enters and thats it. then if your lucky it might be gud . . . wait a week or two until the next time you have sex and the pain should have gone by then the more healing time you have the better it will be next time and i dout you will feel pain the next time you get together .
if your really worried about getting pregnant try have sex at a time where you are less likly to become fertile like for instanse the ending of you period where you begin a new month . you can also ask your boyfriend to pull out before he cums if that will make you feel anybetter until you are comfortable .
my best advise would be to try use more then one contraception like going on the pill you can also go to a diffreny doctor it doesnt have to be your gp or the same clinic
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