A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:how long do most people wait before sleeping with their new partner? ive started seeing a friend of mine and was wondering how long most people wait before they first sleep together? i know it should be "when the time feels right", but im just curious about what the average waiting time is? thanks!! xx Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2007): They should wait until they really know each other. A year is a good time to wait. In other words, just because you met, it doesn't mean you know each other. The attraction at the beginning could have been a lustful attraction for sex. If he's interested in you, he will wait. You know how it feels to give in the first 1 or 9 months and then the relationship ends. What happens, you feel bad and wonder what did you do wrong. Don't have sex unless you know that he can respect you and that he is willing to wait as long as he has to. If he finds someone else then you know he was not the right man for you.
A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (6 April 2007):
 Longer is usually better. It's a strange feature of the male mind, but the longer they have to wait, the more they tend to feel the end result is 'worth something'. Men like a challenge, if you sleep together too soon that sometimes it makes it feel too easy (hence 'she was easy'), and they'll go off you. I wish more women understood this very simple fact, it would make it easier for them to hang on to boyfriends :(
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2007): The "average waiting time" varies greatly. 1 and 1/2 years for me and my boyfriend.
(But we are only 16/17)
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (5 April 2007):
 You're right in saying that the right time is usually when "the time feels right". Every couple is a little different. Personally, with my boyfriend I waited two and a half months. The wait was good, it let me know that he wasn't just after the sex... he really enjoyed my company. However, with some couples it feels right after a few weeks. I know most of my girlfriends wait three-four weeks with their conquests...
The way I feel, holding out for a little while makes the sex that much better. I'm glad I waited a few months... it gave our relationship time to really grow and mature and for us to be great friends. THEN we added in the 'lovers' equation, and it was awesome. It was lots of fun and well worth the wait.
Whatever you decide is best... whatever "feels right" (I know you didn't want to hear it, but there it is anyway.)
xxIndia
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