A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I'm stuck in a difficult position with a guy I've just started dating. We dated for three weeks and it was probably one of the best starts to a relationship I've ever had. We were compatible in pretty much every way. We would see each other 2 times a week so as not to rush into anything. In the fourth week he told me that his ex girlfriend who he had dated for about a month came to his house that day and announced that she wanted him back. I think he was being very honest and open about it. He told me that he believed she only came back because of jelousy (because he was now with me etc) and that he was happy with me and didn't want to be with her because it was always unstable. I met up with my boyfriend a couple days later and his ex was texting him and calling him when I was there. I saw him ignore her calls, but I felt uneasy about it. I asked him how it was going and he said that she had shown up at a bar he went out the previous night and then followed him to a club and then shown up at his house unannounced. He spoke about being really irritated with her but again said he was happy to be with me. After that night - i barely heard from him that week. He cancelled plans on me 3 times and said that he was really busy with work. He didn't text or call and only sent one email, which was sweet, but his behaviour seemed 'different' to the previous weeks. I met up with him at the end of the week to basically find out what was going on and put it straight that I only wanted to be with someone who is happy, otherwise we were wasting each others' time. He said that his head was just a mess. He didn't not want to be with me, but he wanted to be 100% certain about me before we spent more time together- basically he felt confused. He's also been really stressed due to a final project for university being due in a month. All in all he said it was just all getting on top of him. I said that I'll give him some time, but i hope he contacts me soon. As i left to catch the train home he kissed me but after a few seconds I pulled away and jumped on my train. He was lovely about it and said that I am one of the most amazing girls he has ever met, but of course this only makes it more confusing as I don't know if he is a typical Italian and great at the romantic stuff, but its just a load of B.S. It's been a week and I haven't heard anything. I haven't contacted him until today when I saw on his msn message that he 'felt like the world around him is falling appart'. I sent him a quick message online saying 'I want to give you your space - but i saw your message and wanted to check you are okay. If you need me, you know i am here.' five seconds later he signed off. So here is the main delemma - we only went out for 3 weeks and he's already confused. Is it worth giving him space or should I just move on?I think he is amazing and really well matched for me but I also feel horrible at the moment waiting and frankly like I am being ignored and punished. How long do I give him if he needs time? Or do I end it...?Sorry - I know it was long, but if anyone can shed some light on this, I would really appreciate it.Many thanksCharlotte x
View related questions:
ex girlfriend, his ex, move on, msn, text, university Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, diva girl  +, writes (19 May 2008):
girl the same thing happenened to me but i've been dating mine for 3 years. just give him a couple weeks to just be a guy! don't call him or talk to him! just let him cool off and think about everything! if he decides o go out with his ex, then you don't need him anyway! good luck!!!
|
