A
male
age
41-50,
*pidermonkey911
writes:My situation is quite complicated and the question is at the end. The primary problem is I am head over heels for a young woman at work. I am 17 years her elder. I am a professional Firefighter and Paramedic and she is about to complete her training, but is currently a volunteer at my place of employ. We have been flirting back and forth for months and most recenlty I asked her out on a date. She accepted the date, however, the plot thickens.I am in the middle of a divorce; I am currently seperated. I have two yound children who remain with their mother due to my schedule that would prevent a solid environment. The divorce will be uncontested and is not a nasty break-up. My marriage has been failing for years and we remained together for the children. It simply came time to end the 12 year marriage.The woman in which I am interested is in the middle of a break-up from a lengthy relationship. Her sister, who also volunteers with us, absolutely hates me. My sweetheart frequently tells me that she is not fond of her sister.Here's the meat of the story: The woman I like does not seem to want to talk on the telephone. She does do the text messaging thing. I have written her a letter to explain that I am not looking for a serious relationship, but I won't stifle the inevitable, should it happen. I know the relationship would have to remain a secret, while pending divorce and from my co-workers. Unfortunately, I truly beleive that there is such a thing as a head-over-heels, madly in-love relationship, and I have never experienced such a thing. I feel like I deserve to be happy with someone and want to make them happy. I am utterly crazy about this woman. She make me feel young and alive. ...and she is absolutely beautiful, as well. It would be great to date someone who shares my occupation, as it is difficult for others to understand the lifestyle.I merely want to get to know her in an 'outside of work environment'. Obviously, my heart wants more, though. I know that I am not re-bounding, but perhaps she is.The Question: Should I continue to pursue this? How hard should I try?
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a break, at work, co-worker, divorce, flirt, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (22 December 2008):
 You really know the answer to this. Let all things settle down. If it is ever meant to be, it will eventually happen, but at this point you would be throwing gasoline on a fire - and you know it.
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