A
female
age
51-59,
*mks
writes:Trying to understand his feeling.. we dated 20 years ago and recently started seeing each other, but three hours away. I am currently separated. i have visited his home several times, when I’m there it is like I’m the most important person. He treats me great, introduced me to all of his friends, went to go see all of his family. Refered to me as aunt to nieces and nephews. he has taken a trip an hour from his home with me to let me see old friends. He is always concerned if I’m ok, or upset, before I go home, he’ll automatically always check to see if the car is clean, fluids are right etc. he makes me feel right at home in his home, I can answer phone, even his cell phone (which is unbelievable). When I visit it is not all about sex, we are constantly going and doing things. when I would ever leave he would always give me kiss goodbye and huge hug, like he didn’t want to let go.. the problem is he won’t call me too often, due to my situation at home, get mad easily since I’m not telling him specifics of impending divorce, as I’m still working through that. He knows how much I care, however, he doesn’t tell me his feelings. I am friends with his sister whom has filled my head with all kinds of information telling me he loves me, wants me to move there etc. I needed to get answers to some question and was unable to reach him so I sent him a letter, basically telling him my feeling, telling him what was going on with divorce, and asking him for clarification on items which is sister has been telling me. I was not asking for commitment, but rather clarification on what he wants to happen. He received letter and still has not called me, but did call his sister and asked what in the world she has been saying to me. She denied everything. One of things she told me is he doesn’t think I’ll get divorced. I know he has been hurt several times in the past.. what do you think he is doing or feeling about me
View related questions:
divorce Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, MuffinGirl  +, writes (20 November 2008):
 Probably he has serious attentions with you, but as you said he is not sure you will get divorced. Try to understand him and his reaction. If you were him, you would probably react on same way, don't you think so? The second thing is that he is gone through bad relationship and that made him more careful and insecure about women. I know you told him you love him but it's that's the easiest thing you can do and truth can be different sometimes. I think he knows that. You're not used to wait so much time on confession of big love someone feels about you. Don't feel weird about that. I can tell you from my experiences. The guy who says "i love you" after just one or 2 week of dating is a liar. I mean, how can you possible know that you love somebody so soon?
What i'm trying to say is, his actions are important here. He treats you well and that's what important here. You should accept that he won't tell you about his feelings so quickly. He needs more time.And you don't have any reason to worry about that. He needs time to be more open with you and you have to get divorce as fast as you can.
Good luck!
|
