A
male
age
41-50,
*evMick
writes:With Facebook, Google +1 and the ilk we are flooding more of ourselves into the public eye than at any other time in history. Given that fact, do you take comments, flirts or pokes too seriously?These sites are targeted as social interaction, for you to meet, comment and like things other people are doing. However with that level of openness, there will always be backbiting, Chinese whispers going on. (Chinese whispers - the game you play as children where you whisper in someones ear and then it get's passed along to see how it changes.)So, when you receive a flirt, or something similar why not think, if I had a bf/gf how would they react to this flirting?
View related questions:
facebook, flirt Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2014): Maybe it sounds too old-school, but I like a more direct approach when it comes to flirting. I need an immediate reaction. Not one with winking-emoticons and pulsing hearts.
Seriously?!!
I need eye-contact, body-language, smell, a sexy voice-tone, and touch. We passed notes to crushes when I was back in grade-school. A Facebook flirt is just a more trendy virtual way to send a crush-note. It's a cute, childish; but impersonal gesture.
I don't have to hide. I've got the nerve to walk up to someone and introduce myself. I get rejected sometimes; but I know they were flattered by the attempt. I prefer to serve my flirtations nice and warm. Up-close and personal.
I've spent a life-time developing interpersonal and communicative skills. So I put them to good use. It has always paid-off. I don't fix what ain't broken.
I haven't dated anyone I've met online. I have a very active social and professional-life. I meet people along the way. We exchange numbers, and actually call and/or see each other. I delete numbers I don't hear from, or don't care to.
I'm a mature gay man. I get Facebook flirts from guys and girls. I take it only as flattery. I don't bother to respond to it. If they are persistent, I holler back with a thank you. Nothing too encouraging. I'm never rude. It's still a very nice compliment.
I reserve comment in response to FB flirtation messages; that minimizes or avoids backbiting, sore-feelings, and trolling. Some people are spoiling for a fight. Some don't take rejection well. If I'm not all that, why'd you even bother?
A
female
reader, Aunty Babbit +, writes (31 March 2014):
 Firstly I think if a person is uncomfortable with back biting, Chinese whispers or flirting on Facebook then they should use the privacy settings available on Facebook.
This way they can monitor who can see their posts and pictures and communicate with them. They can control who they invite and receive as friends and block anyone who makes them feel uncomfortable.
In respect of being flirted with and flirting back with someone when you are already in a relationship is basically, I think, down to your own conscience.
I don't think a little harmless flirting should necessarily do harm but I agree with thinking about how your bf/gf would feel about that if they found out. Indeed how would any of us feel if we discovered the person we loved and trusted was flirting on-line with someone?
Personally, I love my husband and would not flirt with anyone either in real time or on-line.
In response to taking it seriously? I think it depends on the person who is sending the requests, comments etc
Many people do take these things seriously and fall in love or put their relationships at risk believing the sincerity of the sender, only to find that they have been misled.
Someone on-line relationships and friendships are genuine and bring much happiness to those people.
I wish you well and hope this helps AB x
...............................
|
