A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: How do you know if he/she is "The One?" Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (11 November 2010):
seeingstars is spot on, people change and after a long time together you may find that the person you are with is no longer the same person you fell in love with. Live for the moment, love the one you're with. If anybody had the answer to your question they'd be one rich person by now!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): Sometimes you just know it. Absolutelty and without question. But I do believe that ... inner understanding ... comes with age and experience. Once you've been through relationships of various forms, such as infatuations, lust, love that's more platonic - all of which may have had you fooled into believing that it was TRUE LOVE at the time - you're better equipped to recognise the feelings that you have for THE ONE.Nevertheless, infatuation/lust can still be confused with true love during those first joyful weeks/months together, so time is definitely the key.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): There is no way of knowing. But it depends on what you mean by "The One". I personally don't think we can always expect to be with one person forever. The right person for you may not be the right person in twenty years time. Things change, and people change too. And sometimes people can drift apart. It doesn't mean that they weren't right for you though. It just means that it is time to move on.
Of course, some people do stay together for life. But I think there is a lot of emphasis on finding that one "right" person. And if a relationship ends, people think it was obviously "wrong". But just because a relationship may end, it doesn't mean it was a disaster, or a mistake, or a waste. Every relationship is valuable, because you learn and experience things.
So I don't think there is any way of knowing how long you will be with someone, or how well things will go between you. You can only give it a chance, put your best into the relationship, and think in terms of what you can give and gain from the relationship, rather than worrying about what you could lose. Just my thoughts.
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A
male
reader, Kenj +, writes (11 November 2010):
Quite simply it takes time. Use as much time as you both need to find out. It will show in her actions toward you and your actions toward her.
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