A
female
age
30-35,
*ca9130
writes:When I met my boyfriend, he looked just fine to me, until some weeks later that I went to his house and found a Fluoxetine box in his nightstand, which is usually for depressive disorders, but can also be used for anxiety ones, like the one he told me had: Obessisve-Compulsive Disorder. We've been dating seven months now and I've seen the symptoms. I'm a psychologist, so I can identify some OCD traits plus some theories about why he has it, but I've never wanted to go deep into that because it's unethical and not healthy for the relationship. Today happend the worst of them all, he told me he couldn't get off his head the idea that his feelings for me had changed from girlfriend to "little sister" because I sometimes behave childish, plus he has thought about being celibate since he was 20 and did it before with an exgirlfriend, but now that he's 27, he feels he should pursuit it because "sweaty activities are not of gentle manner". Now, I know that OCDs can have a lot of sexual and self-esteem issues and I'm okay with him deciding to take this path and I think I can handle it, but I do believe that he should work out this compulsivness. We almost broke up after this two subjects came out, but then he stopped thinking about it and controlled it. It is hard and I know it's the beginning of a challenge and I'm up to it because I love him. How do some of you cope with it? How do you work it out? He also told me that he's never loved before and believes he has failed in loving a person, but he hasn't even given himself the chance to love! Any suggestions to handling this situation?
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female
reader, cca9130 +, writes (3 November 2012):
cca9130 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI want to emphazise the fact that I'm not being his therapist, like I mentioned in the main question. But you're right in the fact that what he's saying to me doesn't sound right.
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (3 November 2012):
 Listen, you can *not* diagnose him. You don't have the doctor/patient relationship. You're too close, too biased, and being his girlfriend is a conflict of interest with being his doctor/therapist.
You have to consider what is healthy for *you*. No matter what pills he takes or what symptoms you see in him, you have to consider the words he's saying to you.
He isn't ready for a relationship, and your choices here will impact YOUR life. You cannot be his therapist, and if he's not wanting a relationship with you, you must respect his wishes. Girlfriend to "little sister" doesn't bode well for you.
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