A
male
age
51-59,
*lack Angel
writes:How do you get the passion back in a relationship. We love each other but she said she has lost the passion. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2007): Well since you know this is the pattern, what do you want to do about it?
How about stop with mimicking her anger as that is REACTING.
What can the two of you do together to build up the friendship and good memories?
How about write a note to her once a week and give her a small gift. On the note thank her for a moment of that week where she was kind and loving and a friend.
When we hear thanks for when we are doing something right; we tend to want to keep doing what is right.
DON'T fall into the trap of critizing, fighting, saying hurtful words. When she is like that, ask her if you could just hold her and comfort her. If she says no, tell her you will take a rain cheque and will hold her when she is ready.
It makes a world of difference to have someone who is there for you even when you are being a twit, hurting and angry...who can still and wants to still love you, accept you and forgive you.
It sounds like a challenge as it means breaking out of old habits and developing new ones.
Don't let the the hurt and anger win. Love and forgive. Be patient. Change begins with one and it's you.
Fighting for the love of your life; it's means to put away foolish pride.
You can do it, have faith and courage.
Also, if you get hurt or upset-find someone you can trust who will just listen to you vent. When we let our anger go on checked; it spirals out of control. Just having someone who will listen and not judge and not use it against you...helps.
This is why I suggest counselling. It is someone who is there for you and who is unbaised. Who listens. They also will help you see the other persons side from time to time which also helps.
Take care and I hope for the best for you.
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (18 February 2007):
 Tell me more about your relationship. How long have you been together? How old are you both? Why does she get angry? What are her good points? If you can fill me in a bit more then I can try and give you some good pointers. Oh, and what are you and her star signs?
Eve
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A
male
reader, Black Angel +, writes (18 February 2007):
Black Angel is verified as being by the original poster of the question How should I cope with her anger. Every help I try to give, either verbal or other wise she snaps at me. She is always angry and I tend to mimic her anger.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2007): Lost passion sometimes equates to being hurt and with it the trust being compromised.
I say build on the friendship and trust first. Be her friend, listen to her, don't react. It's a hard thing to do and be since we as humans tend to want to react.
Give her massages, run her baths. Do nice things for her. Make this become a habit. Put her first.
AGain, sounds way out there but it truly does work.
When she is happy, you will be happy.
And if a woman was asking this...I'd say the same thing.
Change happens when you decide to create it.
Best Wishes.
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