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female
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*rokenheartGT
writes: Ok. So, how do you deal with the fact that someone doesn't love you anymore? I had never before been in love cause I never let anyone in (never wanted a broken heart, cause I am not that strong of a person). I finally let this guy in...and I love him more than life itself. I let him in and shared with him more that with anyone in the world. He's the kind of guy who opens doors for you, how holds your hand everywhere, who walks on the side where the street is( so in case a car derails, he gets hit not you...lol), who will dismiss his guy friends if they ever treat you anything but like a lady. He treats you like you're fragile (no matter how much of a bitch you are, cause he knows who you REALLY are). I fell for him and I know he doesn't want me anymore (he deserves perfection...I know) but I can't shake him. I need to know how to get over him, because I have a feeling he might be that person that when you're 100 years old, and on your death bed...you still think about and will always regret not having been with forever. You will "move on" but never really forget. Always wish you were with him instead. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2007): People, it's not easy to move on! Everyone seems to be telling you it's what you need to do and should do. However, if love were ever that simple, it wouldn't be real.Try to treasure the memories, don't seek him out though, it will only lead to pain. keep hope that he loved you at one point and still will be there for you as a life-long friend.That's what I'm hoping, and will continue to hope for everyday of my life...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2007): us women needs to stop being sissys , lol , we dont need another to make us feel complete , if he;s there or not the sun will still rise every morning , the birds will still sing , life is filled with beautiful things , not just one ( and it isnt only in the from of a man ) Cheer up girly , women have been getting heartbreaks since the beginning of time and they all got over it ,
and i also wanna thank everyone here who added their answers, imust say i came searching the net for some strength and i found it here , so thank you all, have a great day smile smile , jesus loves you ,
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): well, it is really hard to get over, but gradually the feelings fade away. You still love him over a certain amount of time, but you accept that there is no need any more. You learn he has moved on with his life and you need to do so to. I'm not saying its easy to move on, but well, whats the point in loving him if he doesnt love you back. I recommend that you move on and find somebody else.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2007): it sucks and hurts real bad but you cant really do anything aout it. you have to keep busy and think only of yourself for some time. Its your life. You are an individual and it needs to stay that way
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female
reader, miss help +, writes (22 October 2006):
 get on with your live you might find someone better
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male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (19 October 2006):
 I was there too. I lost my exfinance and I was hooked on her for 7 YEARS. I finally got her back, but I had to work really hard to change myself. Then it still did not work out, but I got CLOSURE.
The issue that helped me was that I needed closure not just on the relationship I lost, but on the life I had built up in my head with her. I imagined my kids and grandkids with her, and I had to mourn all of that.
Wrote a book on that 10 year journey. My autobiography is called From Loser to Seducer.
I lost so many years of my life just missing her. It damaged me terribly. Get your closure. I found it very healing.
-Frank B Kermit
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2006): Yeah i feel exactly how you do, everything youre saying about ur ex i can relate to. Me and my ex broke up a month ago i was willing to give up everything for him, i loved him so much i mean i still do, im finding it extremily hard to get over him. i sometimes keep looking at my fone to see incase he may hav text me or foned but nothing? maybe that shows he doesnt care anymore, people change right? and love is blind! i wish i could help you with this but my guess is as good as yours! i wish you all the best Fifi xx
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reader, Inagony +, writes (16 October 2006):
I totally understand how you feel. It's sucks!! Really. Hurts like hell. I have been with this guy for over 3 years, stay and used to work together with him. We always spend time together and did crazy stuffs. We love each other very much. I never have anyone that treats me like he does so I let my guard down. Recently he was acting weird and he looks miserable. He wrote email to me last month telling me for the first time in our relationship he feels so confuse and need time apart. He doesn't know whether he wants to take our relationship to the next level. Imagine how I feel. I cry everyday and literally drag myself to do things that I always love to do just to feel human again. The problem is there's family involve. His family. We've different religion so his mom beg him not to be with me. He is torn apart rite now, don't know what to do. On my side I am willing to do what it takes to be with him but yet, if he doesn't see that we have a future together, nothing I say or do really matters. We are still staying together but I am trying to keep a distance. It's really hard and I messed up couple of times by asking him questions and nagged him and I beat myself into it. I am trying so hard to move on with my life rite now but I still pray for him to love me back. I do not know what to do anymore but to end it without even trying is not an option to me. I am preparing myself everyday that the relationship may come to an end but at the same time I have hope that things will turn out alright. Is anybody out there ever have time apart and come back to their gf/bf in the end? Coz in my opinion time apart means that the relationship is totally over.
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reader, Bobbyjo  +, writes (15 October 2006):
 I understand how painful this is, I believe it is the most painful feeling in the world but in the end you do learn to accept it. What you have to remember is, although at the moment you are in pain, it does not last forever. Trust me, I was still in love with my ex 2 years after he dumped me and even though I knew he was never coming back I felt so scared because I thought the feeling was going to last forever but it does gradually fade.
Please make sure you dont make the big mistake I made and beg for answers and try to change yourself to please him and make him love you again because it doesnt work and will hurt you even more. I know its difficult but you really do need to just let it go and look forward to beginning a new chapter in your life. Concentrate on yourself and go out with your friends more as this will help to take your mind off things. He sounds a nice man, it may even help to stay friends with him, but dont put yourself through anymore uneccessary heartache and blame yourself as it is not your fault, it is just one of those things.
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female
reader, beentheredonethat +, writes (15 October 2006):
 I know it sounds horrible, but you accept it.
You accept that If you truly love him as much as you Think you do that whatever they want is OK...even if that means they want to be with another or even just not with you. Real love is about the other person. True love is giving your love with no strings attached. They don't have to love you back, or be yours, or make YOU happy.
Sure it hurts because you want them to feel the same way you do. But, that can't always be.
Every single thing that happens to you makes you better and stronger and wiser than you were. You will need this experience to move on to the next place...and that is life. It is one of those things that makes some old people really wise even when you think they have no way of understanding what your life is. The world has changed...how could they understand? Because THEY had to deal with hurts and joy and ups and Downs....just like your doing now. No, probably not exactly the same....but closer than you may think.
Don't look at a relationship that was wonderful as a failure...because you didn't stay In Love forever. It gave you a lot even if you don't realise it now.
Think of each relationship you have in your life as a candy bar. Sometimes....no matter how wonderful it tastes....it is just finished. Right now all you can think of is that empty wrapper and how much you want the candy to still be in there. Instead, savor the wonderful time you had eating it and let yourself be ready for the next sweet lovely treat your life has in store for you just around the corner.
When you are 100 years old and on your death bed...what you would really regret is being afraid to try any other candy bars for fear of ever finishing one again. No matter how wonderful he was, there is someone out there who will someday make him fade from your memory. You will never forget him and you don't have to....but, One day you will find that if you look back objectively...he was not the one for you. He taught you something just from your description. He taught you exactly what a gentleman does for the person he cares about. Now you will expect to be treated like a princess in the future and will never put up with being treated badly by a man. Good for him....He's done you a wonderful favor.
Also understand that most people have been exactly where you are. Everyone understands how hard it is to move on...it is one of the lessons in life. Sometimes we loose the perfect Job, or someone dies and all of it is about learning to accept the losses, cherish the gains and find our own way.
Give yourself time and while you are single, find something you can do to improve yourself. Read, learn a new skill, develop a hobby. Do something to make yourself feel great about yourself and Don't fall into the trap of thinking YOU were not worthy of him...and that's why it ended. You were not ready for Mr. Perfect...and this guy was just one of the steps you needed to be prepared for someday.
Be the best person you can be tomorrow...and the next day...because you never know when Someday actually is.
Best of Luck to you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2006): He sounds like a special guy and that you had a good relationship with him. You don't say why you think he does not love you anymore, was it because you were a bitch to him as you hint in your question, did you take him for granted? Maybe you need to do better in your next relationship and learn how to treat you a person when in a relationship...Maybe you are giving up too soon if you feel that strongly for him. Try contacting him after awhile just to stay in touch, and start over being his friend first, earn his respect by being emotionally independent in spite of how you feel for him, you are OK alone without him aren't you? You will live past this, and what better way to live to a hundred then to have fond memories of all of the loves in your life, is that the worst that can come of this? Cheer up and get on being your busy self there is always more than one way to view things.
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