A
male
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anonymous
writes:I've posted before e.g. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/maybe-i-do-lack-empathy-but-has-my.htmlI think the time has come to move on. My question is how do you break up in the least painful way possible? We share a house (mine), we share friends. How do you do this? Is there a crossover period? Should I move out and rent for a while to allow her to get herself sorted? I'm wealthy and she has no money. How does that work? Do I give her some money to get herself on her feet? She does work a full time office job so she has some money.
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (23 May 2012):
 Think of it like as if you have to jump in to a cold lake of water.....
The smart, quickest, easiest way to do it is to get up your courage, put on your "big boy" undies, hold your nose and jump in.... Be happy that you can, quickly, swim to the side and get out, and get yourself wrapped in a warm towel and get inside the house....
THAT is how you break up with the least amount of pain...
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (23 May 2012):
 Sit her down and face to face tell her what is not working for you.
She will be upset and maybe angry.
If you move out of your home and leave her there you may never get her out. And you will have to pay rent elsewhere.
This is because of your laws in England that allow strangers to take over a home that is not occupied at the time. The strangers take over, don't pay rent and then the owner has a huge battle on their hands to get these people out - and while these strangers continue to live in the home (unauthorized).
I saw a program recently about England where strangers were moving into a home that was not their own and the home is unoccupied - and they had no rental agreement.
Sounds like a nightmare. They refuse to look after the property - and they NEVER PAY RENT.
Stay in your home.
Assist her to find some shared rented accomodation elsewhere.
Ask for your keys back and then change the locks.
If she is working then she should still be able to pay rent, even if she shares a place with others.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2012): There is no painless way. No matter how you tip-toe, it's gonna feel to her like being stabbed in the chest.
But it heals quicker if you make it a clean break. No cheating, no lying. Good, honest truth.
Tell her you don't feel the same way about her now, that you are no longer in love with her. That's it. That's all you need do.
Just make sure she understands she didn't do anything wrong, you just fell out of love. It' happens.
Flynn 24
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