A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:How do you effectively back-away emotionally from a partner in a relationship.I've been with my fiance for 4 years. Lately she's been giving me really weird vibes and is very unclear as what she really wants from me. We were supposed to get married in December, (we got engaged about a year ago). She has decided to go to school in another country(which I was going to move with her, but her parents convinced her to move on her own, at least at first). We had a fight about two weeks ago, and since then she really hasn't given me ANY emotional responses or energy other than what she needs to do for herself, absolutely NOTHING for us, and when I asked about it, she said she needs to hear/feel what I need for myself. I told her exactly what I felt, no games, and haven't gotten any response. I'm, of course, bummed, but more frustrated with the lack of feeling coming from her, and really feel it's time for me to back-off emotionally from her so I can clear my head as well so I can stop thinking about this.
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (23 May 2009):
 I would suppose that someone who wants to marry someone else would be trying to find ways to become closer to that person, not to detach himself emotionally. I see serious trouble here.
I have the feeling that you want to keep the relationship despite her behavior. That is a very bad idea. Either she's with you, or not. If you just let the relationship continue, you will become a heavy burden and she'll dump you.
This is the time for a sincere conversation.
A
female
reader, DanniBaby  +, writes (23 May 2009):
Hey hun,You really need to sort this out properly, because you will only end up regreting it in the future if you don't.You obviously love this girl which is the reason why you have been together for such a long time and are now engaged, congratulations btw:)But seriously, if she is not showing any emotion towards you , you should really open up to her more be honest, tell her how shes making you feel. Tell her your confused and you really want to sort this out properly because you love each other and intend to be with her for the rest of your life.I'm sure she loves you more than she is showing right now because shes probably under stress/pressure from school. Support her, i'm sure it will all work out in the end. Just make sure you make it clear to her you love her more than anything in the world, bring the romance back into your relationship just how you would of when you first got together!Good Luck X
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