A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i love my boyfriend verry much but i feel like we are falling apart. I work long hours and he is studying for college, i understand that it is very important that he dose this and it takes up alot of his time. The problem is... when he's not studying he plays Games (like online group games) and i feel like im not important to him.When i say this to him he tells me i am important and the game just aids his stress. But when i try to have a full conversation with him about how i feel he goes quiet and says he finds it hard to talk about his feelings( he was always like that when i met him but got over it for a while and now he's gone back) so i tryed writing to him and this worked for a short timenow i just feel like theres nothing i can do can any1 help me?
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female
reader, Susan Strict +, writes (25 April 2008):
 Lots of men have trouble talking about their feelings, so that's not unusual.
You said you love him, so what do you love about him? Can you list everything you love about him? Can you list anything you love about him? And what is it that he loves about you?
Maybe you just haven't mentioned it, but it looks to me from what you have said so far that you don't really have any relationship at all now even if there was something there once.
If you think there is something worth saving, then sit down on your own and work out exactly what that something is. And then do the same to work out exactly how you would like him to behave towards you - is it only that you want him to leave the online computer games alone? If he did leave them alone, what would you and he be doing together?
Do all that, and think about the answers you found. Then maybe it will become easier to move forward, or maybe you will have another question you want to ask here.
Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): Do you know online games such as the xbox live games are the devil! I have the same problem dear and it doesnt matter how many times you say it....its an addiction. I work weekends and have my children while my partner works all week but when he gets home he doesnt have quality time with me - he has it with his blinking computer and people on it he doesnt even know!
It definately makes you feel unimportant but I think they think because we are in the same room as them that that counts as time together.
I told my partner that I feel like I haven't seen him for ages and it makes me sad inside - we live together and yet I really do feel like a single mom alot of the times. Since our latest discussion he has reduced his time on it so my advice would be to be honest, even if it seems like you are being silly. And do what I do, pray the thing either breaks down or he will grow out of it! Hope this helps x
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A
male
reader, binhquangdao  +, writes (25 April 2008):
 game is a guy way of relieving stress it gives him an away like for females you guys go to the salon fix your hair do your nails for a guy it's play video so give him what he wants or ask him can u play along or learn he would be shocked show some interest in what he does.
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A
female
reader, Shivvii +, writes (25 April 2008):
just try and talk to him again and if it doesn't work think to yourself is he worth it? Does he really care about you? If you think negativly towards those questions then maybe he is not for you.
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