| A
female
age
41-50,
*appy2bme
writes: we've been 9 yrs already and we're planning to get married nxt year. however something is wrong. We argue and fight most of the time on small things. he actually asking for time and space and I was feeling bad, thinking what to do.. I texted him for a talk and he never give me a reply when or where. I want to sort things out and wants his cooperation on how we can resolve what was going on. what should I do now?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, T-Marie  +, writes (13 August 2010):
 Hey there,
You need to give him a little time and space if that is what he wants, it may just be that he is a little scared of marriage. I know from experience that planning a wedding puts a huge strain on any relationship. I think you should ease off a little because the more you text and call him, the more he will say you aren't giving him the space he needs.
Make sure when you are texting him you are not abrupt like "what's going on!!" or "Why won't you talk to me?"
You need to soften the situation with the messages you send such as "baby I miss you, when you are ready to talk just let me know".
Apart from that i'm not quite sure what to say, you just need to subtly encourage him to open up to you.
I hope this helps xxx T
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (13 August 2010):
 Put your marriage plans on hold for the moment. You need to have a chat with your fiance to discuss what is happening in your relationship.
Dont text him - phone him or go and see him and there and then set up a time and date for a chat. You both need to discuss how you feel about each other and about the relationship.
Dont leave this - and if he doesnt want to co-operate then suggest a relationship counsellor. If he doesnt want that either, then time to re-assess whether you want to continue with this relationship.
Honeygirl
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2010): Give the man some space! The main reason why couples - no mattter how much they say they are in love - begin to bicker and argue over little nonsense things is because they are together TOO MUCH and TOO OFTEN.
Everyone deserves to have some space to do their own thing, and that shouldn't change when you are in a relationship. Now I'm not suggesting you guys go on a "break" and start seeing other people, but give some time, without or relatively little contact, to miss each other.
Remember the age old saying, "absence makes the heart grow fonder"
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