A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:One of my 14 year old friends and his girlfriend (also 14) are thinking of having sex... they dont know that i know they want to and i want to try and stop them. They are both very close to me and they are not thinking of using contraception. Any ideas? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Mike Wilson7  +, writes (30 September 2008):
u should try and stop them because u r only tryin to protect them from ruining their lives but... if they still decide to do it any way tell them that they should use 2 condomns put 1 over the other because there is a 20% chance it will brake so a 2 in 10 chance
so at least if the one on the inside brakes there is still another one to protect them
i know this because one of my dad's friends told me this he does this all the time
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2008): Hey thanks everybody, you have been a great help... I have got them a condom just incase they did go ahead with it. The thing is that it was my girlfriend who told me about this (we have agreed never to have underage sex)and the thing is that my friends girlfriend (my girlfriends friend) wanted my girlfriend to go buy a condom with her, because she talked her into using one. How rude is that of him, it should be him doing the bying of condoms. And i was just so angry at this. Why should my girlfriend be dragged into this when it is nothing to do with her. I still think that what they are thinking of doing is stupid and im going to try and pursuade them not to.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2008): Hey babeswithbrains,
Your advice was really good. That sounds much more better. Dear Mr.Caller, I think that should work, if you put it that way, it sounds really realistic and is much more likely to be listened too... Follow babeswithbrains advice, she didn't get that name without a good reason....
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2008): Take the guy aside, and remind him, that if he gets his girlfriend pregnant he will be in big trouble. Emphasise the trouble that she will be in. If he loves her, it's his job to make sure he keeps her safe. If he ruins her life she and her parents will help him.
She could get pregnant and be forced to have an abortion or get the baby adopted cause she is so young. It will be all his fault. She could be forced to keep the baby, it will ruin her life. She will no longer be able to go out with her friends. Her parents could force her to dump him. They could throw her out and get the government to put her into a home because she is a danger to herself and out of control. She won't be able to continue her education, she won't be able to go to school with a baby. Therefore she will find it hard to pass exams and get a good job. She and the baby will be living in poverty, and he will have caused all this. Just for a little bit of sex, this is a very stupid idea.
There are punishments for your male friend as well. He can also be placed in a home, if his parents or the government think he is irresponsible and trying to have a child at his young age. Her parents could call the police and try to get him placed on the "sex offenders register" for having sex with an underage boy. He will have to find money from somewhere to look after her and the child. He won't have any spare time to hang out with you or go anywhere or buy anything. For the next 18years all these two stupid kids will be worrying about is a baby.
Dose he want to clean up shit and vomit. Dose she want to spend every night sleepless, feeding a baby every 4 hours. Dose she want to buy her clothes in charity shops and stay at home with a baby every day... Having a baby when your young is definitely no fun, and the sex is usually crap as well...
Tell them you are their best friend, but even though your the same age you think that they are stupid. Tell them you wrote to DC.. In fact print this off and tell them from me that they are bloody stupid if they think that sex doesn't bring babies...
UNDERAGE SEX IS ILLEGAL, AND YOU CAN BE PUNISHED IN MANY WAYS... Only a stupid idiot has underage sex without a condom. If she gets pregnant there will be bloody hell to pay. If they must have sex then go and bloody buy the condoms for them.. Tell them your a friend, but they are crazy if they think you will stay at home and babysit with them when there are fun things for teenagers to do...
PS: The NHS can help thing if things go wrong... Give them the following advice and address.. There is a pill that she might be able to take if she has unprotected sex. But they are bloody stupid. They are gonna get caught, they are too bloody stupid to have sex, cause they don't know how to protect themselves...
The NHS in the UK run a 24/7 telephone advice service. http://www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk/index.aspx. You can contact them on 0845 4647 if you need emergency advice on contraception and pregnancy. Don't be afraid, call them, they are there to help. They have special services for teenagers in the UK and are able to provide advice and support. In case of an emergency there is a pill you can take as long as you hurry and get to a doctor within 72 hours.
Sorry babes, you got some stupid friends. They are lucky to know somebody as sensible as you. Do what you can to warn them. But at the end of the day it's their life.. If they want to mess it up, then let them, what else can you do. They will be the one's to pay, and you'll be the one making a success at life cause you got more sense than them... Do your best, but then it's up to them.. Blessings, your parents must be proud of you. Your a great friend. Take care of you.. :^)
...............................
A
female
reader, babewithbrains +, writes (29 September 2008):
 :D
Just tell him, you know, gentle like:
"Hey, you know your girlfriend, [name]?"
"Uh huh, yup."
"My mates mate said his mate overheard his mate saying you were thinking about doing it with her..."
"Oh, uh yeah, maybe.."
"Don't, man, it ain't worth it, my mate's girlfriend's younger sisters bestfriend got knocked up and she had the most painful abortion ever and totally ruined it between them."
"Oh..."
"They did it with contraception but the condom split. They hadn't told her parents and she nearly got kicked out."
"that's harsh..."
"Just saying, it ain't worth it, right?"
"Uh, Right."
Well, I hope my little role play helps and if you want I'll be a mate who mate overheard whatever. I did make it up by the way. I hope you realized that, but don't tell him. I hope I didn't make him sound to dumb.
Best of luck, and I personaly think it's great that you care about him.
Jelly
xxx
...............................
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (29 September 2008):
I really think as their friend you have to give them some hard facts.
NOT USING CONTRACEPTION AT 14 IS THE MOST STUPID THING IN THE WORLD!
Do they never want to go out to a bar? or ever have a boyfriend till they are 20?
Because when you are off going to festivals and out every weekend having a great time, they are going to be at home choosing nursery schools.
Tell them that if they are THAT stupid then you don't want to be their friend any more. You want friends who are going to go somewhere in life rather than hanging out with their mum and hoping to get a council flat.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
|
