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age
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writes: here is the thing i am 15 almost 16 in the uk -legal age of consent is 16 - any ways .me and my boyfriend of 2 years he is 24 okay now there is a age gap i am very mature for my age and my parents now know we are in a relationship and they think we are very cute together.okay so about 3 months ago i asked my bf if he wanted to have sex i said i was ready ..but he wanted me to talk to my mum about birth control and the fact that we wanted to have sex.so i did and she said that if i do get pregnant she will support me but of course she will be disappointed.so 3 months down the line i am pregnant and me and my boyfriend are so happy . we haven't told anyone yet because it is still in the early stages of pregnancy but i will start showing in a bit.i am scared to tell my dad .i no my mum said she will support me but i am scared as hell.we will not give this baby up for adoption and we will not decide to have a abortion because that is murder.how to tell my dad?should i tell him or should my mum tell him?how should i tell my mum?how should we tell his family ?i think that i will tell my friends after all the family knows because i will find it easier to tell them because we are so close. help please
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): im 15 myself, and a good mate of mine had a little boy when she was 16/17 and taken exams, now 18 and with her 1 year old Oliver shesdone an amazing job, she did brilliantly in her exams and is even back in sixth form doing a cache course.
it may be hard to tell your parents but you need to, you must be nurvous about it and the quicker you get it done the better youll feel, you mum- bless her like mine,said she will surrport which is great, that takes abit ofpressure off knowing that she wont be angry at you dissapointed slightly but she will be fine.
age difference so what, i was 13 when i startedgoing out with my 16/17 year old boyfriend, itll be 2 years in january and as long as you are happy thats all that matters now :)
my friend did say she found it a struggle being pregnant, losing some of her friends and having her little oliver kicking her all the way through them but you can do it, you obviously love your boyfriend and love your little bumpy already and keep your chin up babe,study, and you will do great.
fingurs crossed for you
all the best xxxx
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Natasia and Dmartin89, I appreciate that you are tryng to encourage our Op, and basically you are right- once she has decided to keep the baby , might as well have a positive attitude.
Nevertheless I think it's not fair though dismissing so lightly Celtic Tiger 's comments.
I HAVE been pregnant and all my relatives and friends have been pregnant, and while of course pregnancy is not a debilitating illness, for a vast majority of women it's notat all the cinch or stroll in the park you make it sound. Particularly at our OP's age.
MANY women do feel drained and debilitated toward the end.
Fatigue is a very common symptom in pregnancy. Loss of concentration is another. Every woman is different and every pregnancy is different, so maybe the OP will feel
energized and fit as a fiddle till the day of birth- but
this is VERY far from certain so Celtic Tiger's comments are only reasonable.
The OP is a teenager who is taking the responsibility to make a very adult thing : a baby. She has to take that as an adult - knowing that there are gonna be difficulties , and it's not gonna be such a piece of cake. That she can handle everything in the best possible way, it's something that of course she has our best wishes for.
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female
reader, natasia  +, writes (17 November 2010):
and a question for celtic tiger: have you ever been pregnant?
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female
reader, natasia +, writes (17 November 2010):
well done, s.smurf! You have done it all right. Perfectly. Told your parents, told people at school and close friends, have everyone's support, have your exams covered.
And celtic - well, if smurf has her exam dates, presumably she can take her exams then? How do you know she is doing final exams and not all modules? But anyhow, that will be her school's job to sort out. Not ours. We don't know the details.
And also ... dc is completely right, as far as my experiences of pregnancy go: pregnancy is actually one of the BEST times for getting things done, having a clear calm head, having lots of energy, and producing good work/thought/etc. I always find that when I am pregnant, I think more lucidly, genenerally, and have a lot of steady, paced energy. It is a golden time, and I have done some of my best work (writing) when pregnant.
So, smurf, likelihood is you'll do better in your GCSEs for being pregnant, rather than being all up and down every month with teenage hormones. Your body now has what it wants, so it will be nice and quiet and let you get on with something else.
OK, some women have tricky pregnancies, but at your age, it is likely to be a breeze.
DON'T WORRY. PAT YOURSELF ON THE BACK. YOU HAVE DONE AND ARE DOING AMAZING WELL UNDER THE CIRCS. It really will all be fine.
nx
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for everyones answers but mostly for dmartin89 support thanks i am studying for the other 10 gcse's subjects i have not yet taken and i will finish y exams hopefully then i may take the final month of my pregnancy off to rest ..
i can not say if i will be drained because i don't know .
but thanks for everyones help
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female
reader, dmartin89 +, writes (16 November 2010):
 celtic_tiger what little faith in pregnant women you have!!
How do you know she will be too tired and too drained?
I'm not sure if you aware of this but students actually sit down to take classes and exams. Practically from Christams, GCSE and A-level student are off school for study leave.
It is also well known that many pregnant women have a burst of energy in the last months of pregnancy.
GCSE examination run from November 2010-June 2011, all the AQA examinations finish in March.
Doctors don't prescribe students off school unless they have a high risk pregnancy and need bed rest.
Anyway, I can imagine she will be seeing very little of doctors and a little more of midwives.
Sexysmurf, you have handled the situation maturely. Good luck with your pregnancy and exams. These ones are the building blocks of your education and career, study your ass off! :-)
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male
reader, TimmD  +, writes (16 November 2010):
 Good job not waiting too long. Let us know if you have anymore questions.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni have now told my parents i told them together .. they were both disappointed of course they were about they are going to support me and my boyfriend during my pregnancy and after.
i am taking my gcse's by april because i have been given all my exam dates already.
my school have now been informed as of this morning and also i have told a few of my closest friends. they are very supportive.
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female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (16 November 2010):
 hmm what kind of school do you go to? Because no exam board I know holds final GCSE exams in April. Schools may break up for study leave at the end of April, but exams are held later than that. Edexcel, AQA, OCR all hold May/June examinations.
Results day is marked in for 25th August 2011 I think.
I very much doubt you will be able to finish school in April. Being a teenage mother, your doctor will probably advise home schooling from 6 months on. You will not be physically able to be on your feet ALL day at school whilst pregnant. You will be too tired, too drained.
I think you have a lot to discuss with your parents and your doctor. These things ALL need to be put in place before it is too late. The school needs to be informed you are pregnant and plans put into place for you.
Your school will need to put a lot of policies into action, you will probably be assigned a case officer, to look after you, and there will be lots of forms and paperwork to fill in, risk assesments to do and you may well not be allowed to take part in certain classes for your own safety.
Many schools even exclude teenage mothers as having a pregnant child in a class can cause disruption and having a negative effecrt on the learning of the other members of a class.
These are all things you have to think about now. Life is not going to stay the same and you will be treated differently. I think you are being a little naive to think you will be able to carry on in full time school until the end of April. You will be far too pregnant to cope with it.
Have you told your parents yet?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni am taking some of my gcse 's now and i finish my gcse's in april next year so my exams will be over before the birth of our baby which is due on about the 18th may
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2010): I think you need to understand that your mother has actually aided you into getting you into this situation. She helped you get onto birth control when you were legally underage - until you are 16, legally you cannot give consent to sex, regardless as to what your mother thinks or not. That is bad parenting. Now you have to face the consequences. At 24, your boyfriend knew you were underage but still did it.
You felt you were mature enough to have sex. Now you have to face up to the responsibilities and take the consequences of your actions. One of those is telling your parents. You might not like it, but you just have to get on with it, and take their reactions on the chin. They will be disappointed, and probably very angry that you have been this stupid.
I expect your mum will be more disappointed in you than your dad - because she is the one who helped you get into this mess. She allowed her underage teenage daughter to get into a relationship with an older man. Most parents wouldnt have allowed it to start in the first place. She trusted you, and as a mother, she messed up.
You need their support because the next 9 months are going to be hard, and the next 18 years even more difficult.
Both financially and emotionally. I very much doubt your boyfriend earns enough money to keep you and a new baby on his own. Even married couples with two good salarys struggle, so you will need your parents help.
I suggest you wait until you have passed the 3 month mark before you tell your friends. As a young mother you are more likely to suffer complications. Dont go blurting it out before things are deemed to be safe. Again, this is about being grown up - being pregnant is not like having a doll. Complications can happen. Many women miscarry within the first 3 months and it would be terrible to have to tell everyone you were no longer pregnant.
You will also have to learn to deal with being self sufficient and not having your friends around all the time. Once you get too big, and after the birth, your friends will move on. They wont want to hang about with a baby. You need to understand that life is going to change a lot for you now.
You also need to work out what you are going to do about school. I expect you have your GCSE's next summer.... probably around the time you give birth? so you will be unable to take them. Are you going to take a year out and take them the year after or not take them at all? Will you be homeschooled? You need to get your qualifications. If you dont, you will never be able to provide for your child.
Sadly you now have to grow up and start being an adult. I know this is harsh and you are scared, but adult acts require adult actions.
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female
reader, dmartin89 +, writes (15 November 2010):
Sarahh._x I don't think you have read the question properly. She is happy about the pregnancy and is not even thinking of what she should do with the baby, she just wants some advice on telling her family.
Abortions don't ruin everyones lives.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionokay me and my boyfriend are happy together i hope we can be a happy family.
we can support this child financially because my boyfriend has a very well paying job. i hope my family do accept this i will tell them as soon as possible and will provide a update
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female
reader, Sarahh._x +, writes (15 November 2010):
 My sister fell pregnant, however her circumstances were different, she told my mum outright ok my mum did go skitts but she got over it and so did my dad, she had an abortion as the father was a peadophile and it was best for the whole family. I suggest on NOT having an abortion as it WILL ruin your live if your anything like my sister. You and your boyfriend seem happy maybe you could be a happy family?
If you can't hold a family finacialy adoption would be the best adoption for not only you and your relationship but the child too, I hope I've helped x
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female
reader, natasia +, writes (15 November 2010):
Get your mum alone and tell her. She will then decide how to tell your dad - probably she will do it. Then you can also discuss what she thinks about telling his family. Basically, either he should tell his mum on his own first, or you both could tell her, or your mum could talk to his family for you.
Either way, soon they will all know and remember that while it might seem a huge scandal now, within time you will have a lovely baby and everyone will be over the moon and adore the baby. Yes, yes, you are young, yes, it is all not exactly the right time, but it has happened, and you are right - abortion is murder by another name, and adoption - well, I couldn't give my little baby away, and I doubt you could yours. So there is only one way to go. So you have to deal with it.
And the most important thing is that your boyfriend loves and supports you, which he does - really, there is not much more anyone could ask for. Good luck and well done for being mature about this. xx
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male
reader, TimmD +, writes (15 November 2010):
Well, it sounds like your mom will take it easier than your dad so you probably should tell your mom first. How to tell her? I would just sit down and be honest with her. I would suggest not having your boyfriend there at first, just you and your mom. At that point, with any luck... SHE will tell your dad. Then after that, you and your boyfriend can sit down with both of your parents and have a mature conversation about your plans.
The most important thing to remember is to NOT WAIT. The longer you wait to tell them, the harder it will be for you to do so. Also, the longer you wait the more upset they will be that you waited. Just do it. Immediately. Being pregnant requires special medical care and doctors visits will be needed. You need your parents to be involved so you can get the proper care you require. The longer you wait, the worse it will be for everyone including your unborn child.
Tell your mom AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!
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