A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone I really need your help I have just found out I'm pregnant by my fwb of 9 months I have asked him if we are gonna be together someday and he said yes but how am I gonna tell him I'm pregnant he has a daughter from a previous relationship and I have a son from a previous relationship I was on the pill so did not think this would happen I know it is not 100% how do I tell him I'm so scared
View related questions:
the pill Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2012): Just say "i'm pregnant". Make sure you tell him in person. At the end of the day it takes two to make a baby so he can't blame you.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (9 January 2012):
 You just have to tell him… and quickly. So that you (and he) can decide what to do…
"hi Bob, it's Sally, I know you and I were not planning this and I know that being on the pill we thought it would not be an issue but I have to tell you that beyond belief I've taken a pregnancy test and I am pregnant" Stop breathe... wait for it..... if he says NOTHING you add "now we have to figure out what's best for us to do"
you both have kids so you're not babies.....
you have options in this world....
...............................
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (8 January 2012):
 You come right out and say 'I'm pregnant'. Pretty straight forward. Then I suggest you adopt the 'hope for the best and plan for the worst' philosophy. That means you may be left raising this child on your own, so don't rely on anything he says now. You do whatever you need to do for yourself and the baby. He will be legally obliged to contribute financially, but that could take time and money to go through the courts.
Now I want to address the bit about asking him about being together someday. You NEVER ASK a guy if you'll have a relationship or if you're in one now. You TELL him what you're prepared to give or do and under what circumstances. This does not look clingy or controlling. It's merely establishing boundaries for your own well being and it makes you look confident and accustomed to being treated well.
Women have been accused of being obsessed with marriage and babies so often and for so long that many will put out, and put up with just about anything to prove otherwise.
...............................
A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (8 January 2012):
 How do you really feel about this guy? Would you want him to be in your life permanently? Do you love him? Do you think he has enough substance to deserve your love and not just your sexual whims? If you answered yes to these questions, you just need to call him up, invite him to coffee or something and then tell him what's up. Of course, be prepared for him to deny the child is his. You may have to wait until after the birth of the child and have a paternity test done to prove it. Any woman who has a fwb may have two or three, so a guy can never be for sure that he's the only one you've been with. Plus if he's your fwb there's a good chance he doesn't want more, and therefore the outcome of this news will be less than welcomed. Be prepared for the royal brush off.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2012): The words "I'm pregnant" are thrown around alot these days, but i really think they can help out your case
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 January 2012):
The sooner the better, whether you decide to keep it or not. And honestly, I don't understand why people who have casual sex such as FWB don't use double protection.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2012): You need to tell him as soon as possible, when he's next with you. Invite him over,sit him down, explain.
If you text him instead,or email he may just vanish. In fact he may vanish anyway.Its not what he signed up for,he wanted NSA fun.
You HAVE to either tell him or go it alone. You decide what you want to do.Its a huge decision whatever happens
Sorry about the situation, hope it has a good ending for you x
...............................
A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (7 January 2012):
 You just need to be brave and tell him straight that you're pregnant, and scared as hell!
Best telling him face to face. If he doesn't want to know after you tell him then you'll have a lot of thinking to do, but otherwise you can discuss what will happen.
Be brave hun, good luck :)
...............................
A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (7 January 2012):
You just need to be brave and tell him straight that you're pregnant, and scared as hell!
Best telling him face to face. If he doesn't want to know after you tell him then you'll have a lot of thinking to do, but otherwise you can discuss what will happen.
Be brave hun, good luck :)
...............................
A
female
reader, Usagi  +, writes (7 January 2012):
 first of all, calm down freaking out is not good for the baby. are you completelelly positive you are pregnant? and the biggest question, are you gonna keep the baby?(with or without him around).
if you do want to keep it, talk to him. sit him down and tell him what's going on(it's his child too). don't be scared because he already has a child so he is familiar with the concept. if he is any good he won't freak. he might or might not want to be with you as a bf, but he will probably be calm and mature enough to have a conversation about the child and how are things gonna work
good luck
...............................
|
