A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to call him...okay well him and I were seeing each other for a while and then we decided to to take a break bc he needed to get his head straight....He said he needed time and I was more than willing to give him that. Little did I know that "time" would be killing me so bad. My friend saw that I was hurting and she talked to him...the next day he told me that we needed to talk. He was telling me that he didn't want to see me hurting for him especially because he wasn't sure of anything. He said he needed time but if time was the thing that was killing me then he had to let me go....he said, "don't wait for me no more. Don't hurt for me no more...I'll come back to you. I'll make everything okay within myself...I just need time to think. I'll take the risk and when I come back to you I'll face it like a man and if you deny me then that was my fault." I told him that it was fine and I told him not to blame himself for anything....I care for him soo much and I don't want to let go at all. He says he wants to be friends still but...what if things get weird? What if it doesn't make anything okay? I guess in the end I gave up so bad because I saw nothing with him anymore. I saw no ray of hope and I lost my strength to fight for him. I'm okay....my heart isn't broken...I'm just neutral. If he comes back...I'll make the choice if those feelings that I will bury come out in time for him. Its a weight off my shoulders but...I'm sooo mad that I went through this and in the end I'm empty handed...what do I tell him?
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't even know what's going on anymore...I don't know what to think of him. He acts like nothings wrong when clearly everythings wrong. He cries and he's mad at himself according to his friends....ugh, I don't know. I'm starting to loose the feelings for him and its good but bad.
A
female
reader, chachacha  +, writes (8 March 2007):
I'm sorry for you.
When you split up with someone you go through a number of stages - the first one is often shock, and anger comes along when the shock wears off.
You're in the "angry phase". Sadly, there is absolutely no point in saying anything to him at all. There is nothing he can do to fix anything and nothing that you will gain by telling him. It's your anger.
Try writing it down. Write down why you're angry, why're your hurting, maybe see a therapist and help get the anger out of you.
It will go after a while, popping back occasionally, and at some point you'll move on.
Good luck, and I'm so sorry. Sadly I do know how it feels.
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A
female
reader, aunty t  +, writes (8 March 2007):
 I think he is messing with your head and feelings. It sounds very complicated. If he wanted to be with you he would but I get the feeling he just wants to be friends. Let him see how strong you are as you seem to have come through the worst of it and are more annoyed at him than heartbroken. Tell him your fine and your getting on with your life and yes you will be friends but nothing more. Dont waste any more time on him.
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