A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Is it normal to have your heart broken 4 or 5 times in a life time?I haven't been in many relationships and a couple didn't even get off the starting block - yet I still seem to be the one who gets dumped or passed by, so the guy could date another girl instead! Normally I'm happy to be single, but on the odd occasion I fall for a guy - it's never reciprocated, or if it is - he's usually using me until he finds someone else.How do I stop the heartache? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (8 January 2015):
Hi OP... Why are you feeling heart broken because the men who left you are the ones you DIDN'T sleep with???
You should be happy, and proud!!! Just imagine how you would feel if you did sleep with those men and they left you right after.
Fact is...sex will always determine the kind of man you are dating...why? Because men are all sex driven, no matter how kind and respectable we are. It will always come down to sex. The question is...what is more important to him.
If the guys who left couldn't wait for your special gift, then they were not worth it, and you are making yourself feel bad for no reason.
The right man will not care about sex here and now. He will care about you first, and sex after.
Like I said before...great service is worth waiting for. :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2015): Ironically BrownWolf - the men who broke my heart are the ones I DIDN'T sleep with..
...............................
A
male
reader, BrownWolf +, writes (7 January 2015):
You will have your heart broken as many times as it takes for you to learn. If you fall for men with your eyes close, then you are not learning.
Consider a heartache like a good spanking when you do the wrong thing. Now, look back at all your relationships and look for the common mistake in each one.
One of the biggest mistakes women make is sleeping with a man before he shows any commitment to the relationship. Sex is a good way to keep a man, but not get one.
Good restaurants maintain good service and food (sex)...But they don't give it away the moment you walk in the door. You have to stay awhile and wait to get it.
Ever heard the saying? "Good things comes to those who wait"
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2015): Aww thank you female anon! That is a bright, cheery message to cheer me up! I'm usually bright & cheery myself - but just wonder why I keep getting stabbed in the back by these blokes!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2015): Look, you are beautiful!!! You are way better than all those guys who hurt you! You just be a hottie, single, fun lady :)))))) get over these heartbreaks by dancing, having fun with your friends/family and go shopping, paint your nails, buy a hot dress!!!! Do Anything that will make you feel amazing :)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes - I agree friends can break your heart too! Or stab you in the back!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Sincerely Yours  +, writes (6 January 2015):
 In previous relationships that have failed, I've found myself reflecting on & learning from my past and realizing that one of three things was not right: myself, him, or we as a pair. I've had my heart broken by men, friends, and family. In times, I was immature, closed, insecure, sensitive, and naive. In other times, others were mean, immature, and arrogant; and in other times, a partner and I have been going in different directions, at different levels of life, or possessed characteristics that were just not an ideal match. I've realized after my self reflection that it's not always me and certainly not always someone else's fault. But the problems that did stem from me, I've worked on and progressed with and developed into assets. I can't speak for you or anyone else, but I do advise that you be extraordinarily self-improving and aware of what you need in a partner and not blame the heartache on any single contribution - including yourself!
~SY
...............................
A
female
reader, Sincerely Yours +, writes (6 January 2015):
In previous relationships that have failed, I've found myself reflecting on & learning from my past and realizing that one of three things was not right: myself, him, or we as a pair. I've had my heart broken by men, friends, and family. In times, I was immature, closed, insecure, sensitive, and naive. In other times, others were mean, immature, and arrogant; and in other times, a partner and I have been going in different directions, at different levels of life, or possessed characteristics that were just not an ideal match. I've realized after my self reflection that it's not always me and certainly not always someone else's fault. But the problems that did stem from me, I've worked on and progressed with and developed into assets. I can't speak for you or anyone else, but I do advise that you be extraordinarily self-improving and aware of what you need in a partner and not blame the heartache on any single contribution - including yourself!
~SY
...............................
A
female
reader, Pureflame  +, writes (6 January 2015):
These things just happen. I know its not the best to hear, but its absolutely normal now-a-days for relationships to not work out for too long.
Self doubt can only add to all the troubles.
I don't really know how your relationships have worked, but if you go out of your way for your partner early into your relationship, it might lead you to be taken for granted. The chances of that happening could be high because you don't date very often.
Just try and reflect upon your past relationships.
Also, its okay to like someone of course, but staying a lil cautious while doing so could help cause less pain in case it does not work out the way you want it to.
Wait for the right person to give all of yourself to, date and meet a few people before jumping into a relationship, and try to understand that person.
It usually hurts when we start expecting, so take your time to do so.
Good luck :)
...............................
|
