A
female
age
36-40,
*saulty
writes:My boyfriend of three yrs recently broke up with me and we have a daufhter together. This man is mean and manipulative but i still love him. I dont know why i would love someone who calls me names and hurts me because he doesnt love me back anymore. How do i stop loving him when i have to see him almost everyday bc we have a daughter together?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 April 2013):
 w2hy do you have to see him almost every day?
even when my babies were little I did not have to see their dad daily.... and if it's for drop offs for visitation can you enlist a family member such as a grandparent to help?
I assume he left you since you still love him and yet you say he's mean and manipulative
well he can be mean all he wants you do not have to react
and he can attempt to be manipulative but you do not have to respond.
if you have not spoken to an attorney get a good attorney to write up the visitation and child support issues. Have the child support garnished from his wages and sent to you so he's not involved.
IF he's safe the child can have unsupervised visitation but I would see that drop offs and pick up are done on neutral territory ( a school or a fast food place) and if you can't get someone in the family to help bring a friend along as a witness... that should help control his bad behavior.
as for stopping loving him.... maybe some therapy to help determine why you think you are only worth an abusive man....
A
female
reader, Brokenv  +, writes (15 April 2013):
Time is all we have. I left my boyfriend almost 11 months ago and I still love and miss him deeply everyday I left because of his disrespect for me. I tell you it wasn't easy but I didn't want our daughter going up and thinking his behaviour is the way to treat a woman, any woman. I keep myself busy with reading, playing with the kids, got a dog, taking courses........anything to keep my mind and heart off of him. My mind knows I'm doing the right thing but my heart just hasn't caught up. It is getting easier but I still need more time. Focus on a healthy you! Good Luck Friend! I certainly know how you feel. It is a horrible feeling.
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A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (15 April 2013):
Its very difficult to unlove someone your still in love with and that you also share a daughter. However i think TIME will heal the hurt and also you are seening him for what he is-As you stated he is mean.manipulative,and calls you names,I think your halfway there make new friends start a new hobbie.TIME will sort this out Kind regards Nora B.
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