A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Today wasn't great and this year things with guys haven't really worked out. I don't have a story to share. All I ask for is advice to a few questions: 1. How do I stop liking a guy who hurt me? 2. How do I move on from guys and no longer want any relationship? I ask these questions because I have decided that I want to be done with guys. They just hurt me in the end. Advice on how to steer clear of romantic interests would be very appreciated. Thanks.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2015): Its very difficult to know why a girl of your age would ask that queztion but i guess that you have bden having a rough time lately.
Are you associating with boys of your own age?
For some reason i started to wonder if you had been sexually used by an older adult and if that is the case the best way to get over it would be to report him to the police.
If you are sending that world weary question about boys your own age i wouldnt bother to expect too much.
They are still young.
You are still young.
Far too young to be having sex or sexual contact.It is also against the law until you are sixteen.
Some people brag that they do but usually it is just bragging and rumour.
If anyone forces or tricks you into having sex when you didnt want to, then it is rape.
If you walk down an alleyway and then you start kissing then next minute hes forcing you into sex,then that is rape.
Avoid alleyways.
A kiss doesnt mean yes to sex.
Learn to say no.
Use words like "if you rape me I'll tell the police".
Sound mean and scream.
Defend yourself.
If your feelings are hurt by some fifteen year old boy then tell yourself "Thank God it wasnt worse."
Dont let this kind of thing keep you down.
Find a teacher, friend or police to talk to if your situation is anything from bad to serious.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2015): At any age it hurts when you like someone and they don't like you back. The best thing to do is NOT focus on boys. I know it's hard but you're very young. And believe me it only gets harder, more confusing and just plain weird. You need to focus your attention on other things like school work, hobbies, having fun with friends and family and enjoying being young. At your age you have a bright future ahead. Anything is possible. If you spend all your energy on boys then you'll miss out on so many fun opportunities. Personally my philosophy is I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't want to be with me. And anyone who brings drama and nonsense into my life is...Not Welcome!!Not everyone will like me or think I'm pretty. And thats totally OK. There are millions of people in the world. You will come across people who don't like you. Stuff Happens. Accept it. Deal with it and move on quickly. Don't linger. Don't feel sorry for yourself. Don't make a scene. Don't be negative. Get busy living. Have fun. Sometimes we tend to over think things. Everything isn't a Level 10 all hands on deck major major problem. You have to learn how to categorize what's a real problem versus a non issue. The issue of Boys is a Non-issue. You will have many relationships throughout your life. Some will be great and some will be bad. But every experience is an opportunity to learn and grow as a person. But for right now. Cut all contact with the boy. Don't call. Don't text. Don't stalk him on social media. Who cares what he's doing? He doesn't exist anymore. Focus on yourself. You said "today wasn't great". Ok... There's ALWAYS tomorrow. Finally...You're not done with guys FOREVER.. You're just done with this situation. Which is GREAT! Take a break from boys. The best way to get over any situation is stay busy and be patient. Before you know it one day you'll wake up and feel so silly about stressing over this boy. Take care :)
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A
female
reader, 02DuszJ  +, writes (24 October 2015):
 It's hard enough for adults to understand and deal with the emotions/ heartbreak/ rejection of dating/ relationships... let alone a child, which you are, that's a fact. -It wasn't so long ago I was at school, and I remember how everyone was talking about their "ex" or "relationships". At 13- 14!? So I get that there's way too much pressure to keep up with people- when actually this is all too rushed and early... relationships are for adults, which technically means 18... kids are more immature these days because they've had a lot forced upon them, from the media, everything is accessible, and they've neglected building themselves up as people with values, manners and life skills- just mucking around in territories they shouldn't be in... dating isn't for kids... to add to that boys mature slower than girls anyway and at your age mostly have no clue on how to treat a girl...So don't give into pressure and actually work on building yourself as a person, exercise compassion for others, your self worth and find something you're passionate about, try and pursue it, see how it feels to work for something and achieve it... it'll give you a great sense of self worth and teach you about yourself... You don't need the hurt at your age, you're not ready for it... learn more about yourself before you get deep into others, because it's Tough out there, even more so when you dont know what youre doing... Take care!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2015): Maybe you need to give yourself a little more time to get older, and stop trying to be too serious with boys between 13-15. They are really immature and still going through puberty; so they don't really know how to carry on anything with a girl that's too emotional and serious. They're still kids, and you get hurt because you've forgotten something.
You're just a kid yourself, and you're really not old enough to date or understand how boys think. You can like all you like, but is doesn't make sense to like people who hurt you.
As you get older, you'll learn to move on; and stop putting yourself through a lot of unnecessary drama.
Make some friends and have some fun.
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