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How do I stop being scared that he likes me?

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Question - (10 May 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 10 May 2009)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

There is this guy that I think might like me. I really like him too.

I've never had a boyfriend. I've never had a guy act the way he does around me. It's to the point where I'm scared that he likes me. It's so bad that I've been trying to make it seem like I don't

like him. I've been trying to get over him. I think the thought of someone actually liking me is scary to me. How can I get over this?

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A male reader, Neboraic United Kingdom +, writes (10 May 2009):

Tell him you like him. Its scary but will make everything easier.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2009):

ok here is the thing go up to him and ask him and if he says no then you cover it up with i meant as a friend you will get ur answer

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A male reader, LazyGuy Netherlands +, writes (10 May 2009):

LazyGuy agony auntWhy don't you feel comfortable with the idea someone may like you?

Is it extreme shyness, are you afraid to talk to him or is it something more sinister. Don't you feel worthy of someones affections?

It is impossible to give advice without knowing the reasons. Are you in general afraid to get close to people or is it just men. Are you unsure about your appearance or afraid of what might happen sexually?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2009):

I think it depends on why the thought of someone liking you is so scary. If you dig a little deeper inside yourself, you might find the reason. It could be low self-worth, bad experiences in the past, all kinds of things. If you can pinpoint what it is that is so scary, it will be a good starting point.

Maybe you could get some help from other people too. Perhaps a counsellor, they will be able to help you work on whatever is holding you back.

As for this guy, I think that if you feel that you can handle giving things with him a try, then I would just tell him that you are a bit nervous, and would like to take things slowly. But if you really don't feel ready for a relationship yet, that is fine, but I would just try to let him go for now. Otherwise he could get confused about what you want, and the situation might become more complicated.

Good luck. x

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