A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This is my story, Me and my gf were together for about 3 1/2 years, the first 2 years were great with some minimal issues, like jelousy and misunderstandings but we got over those. After a while i lost vision of who i was and i started to deviate away from the relationship, i felt unappriciated and i started to look for attnetion from other girls while i was with my gf, One day i hacked a guys account from a game and my gf thought it was very unethical ( she was right) but the way she reacted made me feel like the lowest person in the world. she called me a "disgusting pig" at the moment we were going to out to eat, so i asked her to drop me back at my house and she did... then i walked away and didnt talk to her i felt so heartbroken and noone ever in the world had called me that.. I was mad for a few hours after that and i went on to facebook and i changed my status to single and me and my gf still didnt talk until that night and she saw my status had changed.... This is where the story goes straight downhill ............ We didnt talk for maybe 2 days and then i seeked out attention from other ppl and 2 were girls .. I didnt have intentions of dating them i just, felt so low that i wanted to feel appriciated and after about 1 week i realized i had made a huge mistake that i had over reacted and even though she called me "disgusting pig" i knew she took it back soon after.. She apparently over this time takled to her mom and dad and they helped her deal with her sadness .. Then after like that week no talking with me i called her and i apologized to her and asked her that if we could get back together that i was a jerk for over reacting and we did talk and try it out... again. After maybe 4 months being much better i got arrested for driving with no license and was in jail for almost 2 weeks.. She really wasnt my gf but her and her parents supposrted me the whole way and when i got out we reconnected alot stronger .. that was in march of last year. Since then we talked and had a better time. Then we went to her friends bf bday party i drank too much and touched another girl and i also asked her close friend to get with me ,, yes i know i was stupid and drunk and just a total idiot... My gf eventually forgave me but it stayed in her mind.. I got over all my BS and focused on her Now this being October she started to hang out with new friends from school and she didnt invite with them.. She liked to go dancing i really wasnt a fan of clubbing but i would go sometimes.. but from there she started to hide things.. I would see small changes but when i would ask her she would sometimes just not say there was nothing wrong, I do know that she was faithful the whole time , she would never cheat on me.. Then comes January and My old friend who was also her friend told her that i had cheated on her at the beginning of the relationship(((( This was a lie, i told him this because i felt i couldnt trust him and i knew he would go tell her,,, when i told him this lie... was when me and my gf were still so great like 2 years before. I had always told her i couldnt really trust him.. )))))) Then she really broke it off with me she told me she didnt love me anymore ( i knew it wasnt true) SO after 2 week she gave me a chance to tlak to her and hang out and we became more physical and it lasted for about 1 month then i find out i have to go to mexico for 10 years and i cant comeback and me and my (GF) took it hard since she loved me and there was realt nothing she could do...We had talked about getting married before and we were just still young and now when i asked her she thought myabe because i loved her or maybe my sitation . But i did it because we had been through so much and we were doing so much better we could get over this and improve as soon as this problem would be out of the way.. 1 month passed and she said she couldn't take it anymore and she needed space and it broke my heart, The time i needed her the most she cut me off, we talked and now i have 1 month left before i go... and just recently she was talking to me and hugging me and really giving me a chance before i could go.. she had already that she wanted her space and wanted to see what other guys had to offer ... i cant accept it but i dont have any right to say yes or no.. OK WELL... 3 days ago we went out to kareoke with her friends and i drank with them.. my ( GF) didnt drink since she was driving.. i drank wayyy to much and she knew i had a bad past with drinking but she said if i wanted to it would be ok.. so i drank with her friends and i took it over the top and had a good time at first then ... It hit me hard and she told me that i was tripping over ppl and when she dropped me off at my house, i didnt want to leave her car and she called her mom and her mom loves but she said that she cant trust me with her daughter and and that i need to wait a few years to get over my probs .. if i call or text her daughter she will block my numberI was doing so great and was getting their trust back and me and her mom had very serious talks about how much i loved her daughter and she supported me on it and she knew that i had a bad history or drinking sometimes... Its been 3 days now and i miss my (GF) shes probably still mad but she knows im deeply in love with her ,, and she knows that i have to go soon... SO whats the best thing to do ??/ me and her were so great and compatible but i started to be stupid.. i have matured alot and i was maruting so much just my last stupid mistake 3 days ago.. i have vowed to never drink again ... SO PLEASE , ppl will say to get over her but i cant... i want to make the best of my time here with her... so all advie is welcomed . How do i contact her?? How do i show them that i will never drink again? That i love her so much and that i hope we can be together soon if i im going to mex... She told me that she's never loved anyone like me and that if she dates some guys and its not the same then she will come looking for me ... She sure she would want to marry in the future just not at this moment.. HOW CAN I MAKE THE BEST of my time with her and show her my last memories with her can be the best to make my chances higher so she can find me soon so we can get married. PLEASE dont just say to get over her.. Thank you guys and i konw im sorry its so long..
View related questions:
clubbing, drunk, facebook, get back together, heartbroken, in jail, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah i do understand that and during these days i miss her but i dont feel like i need her, i just really want to be with her and to start over on what we had.. shes told me she loves me and that she wants to try agian in a year or so but in the meantime shes trying to go out and have fun and bs with other guys,,, i mean at times i feel like she doesn't love and that she just doesn't even believe in us anymore, but then she's really warm and shows that i'm her best friend and that no one else can come close . I just would really love to marry her and im done with dramas and BS i just want us ..To Start new and that we both can make each others lives the happiest.
A
female
reader, Ishaaa  +, writes (20 May 2012):
 I want to be completely honest here. You probably realize this too. You have not been a good, dependable person with stability to offer. She really does have a good reason to not trust you. Given your history, I would say that you underestimate how long it takes to build trust, and how it years of it can be broken down with one act, and you have a whole mountainfull of trust-slashing events working against you.
I would say, the best thing you can do is show what you feel through your actions. You CAN let her go. You CAN be unselfish and give her time, space, and several, SEVERAL examples of you being completely reformed through ACTION. Pure ACTION.
You say you can't let her go. I say bah, lies. You CAN be unselfish, stop thinking about how much you need her and how much she does NOT need your drama. If you don't present yourself with that course of action, you won't be able to take it.
Actions speak louder than words. Much much louder. I wish you luck in all of your lifely endeavors, and truly hope that you get what you want. [:
...............................
|
