A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi,can anyone offer me good advice on how to rid yourself of the pain,hurt and anger you feel towards someone you loved deeply as they ended your relationship because they are plain and simply selfish Reply to this Question
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male
reader, freeme  +, writes (5 June 2011):
 The pain you feel at your age is very difficult to deal with. I completely understand it. I would plead with you to try and do something positive with the pain. I know that is hard to understand at age 16, but it is really easy to fall into a downward spiral of pain and agony if you spend much time thinking about how hurt you are.I am not suggesting to you that you ignore your pain. You do need to process it. But you have to find a way to do so without falling into a depression. Stay away from music that reminds you of how you feel. Don't ignore the pain, but don't dwell on it and celebrate it. Find a physical activity to do that distracts you for an hour or two. Don't sit around your room all day wondering, "what am I going to do?" This will just make things hurt worse. Get a job, or join a sports team, or find a summer project. (Build something, create something, HEAL something, fix something) I know your pain, you are at a fork in the road right now. Please choose the right path.
A
female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (5 June 2011):
 make an honest list of all their good and bad points. read it back to yourself and keep it for the times when you start to miss them. you may find that they were not always horrible and selfish to you and maybe they did not mean to hurt you. you will also remember all the bad things they did to you and this will make you realise you are probably better off without them.
breaking up is always horrible and its ok to feel bad, every day you will think about them and hurt a little less i promise but you just have to be patient with yourself.
now you are free from them to take opportunities to meet someone great. to get over someone, fill your life with your friends and have fun things to look forward to, don't be tempted to seek out your ex in any way, don't go to places you might see them for a while (if you can avoid this) and certainly don't look on their facebook page etc to check what they are doing. delete all messages they ever sent to you if you have not already.
one day you will look back at this time and be surprised at how hurt you were
x
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