A
male
age
30-35,
*aptainh
writes:I generally feel well liked by others. I fit in with a range of different people. even people who I don't really know that well have said really nice things about me, along with those I do. but negative thoughts about myself have forced me to feel a little socially isolated from things that go on outside of school, as I feel intimidated by the fact that others I want to get to know are surrounded by a group of friends. ive recently come to realize that maybe I haven't shown my full self to people and I feel like I need to put myself out there a bit more in order to feel more included. I know I am good at connecting with people on a deeper level (like I'm not scared to share my feelings), but people may see it as my having a lack of confidence. I just want to show people, especially girls (who I have been to shy to talk to) my full self without it being slightly awkward.
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male
reader, Odds  +, writes (22 September 2011):
 If you know even one person in a group, go ahead and walk over to the group and join the conversation. Just say hi, first to the person you know, then to everyone else. Depending on what's more natural at that point, either introduce yourself or not; if you do, reference the person you know. Then sit or stand quietly, but comfortably, until you've got a feel for the conversation. Contribute a bit, but don't dominate it until you're in with the group.
The trick is not to avoid awkwardness at all costs, but to master it and just let it pass.
Joining clubs and groups is a great way to meet the first couple of people so you can get in with the groups. Try that out.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2011): My advice is for your to join clubs at school if they are offered. For example, at my school I was involved with the Cultrual Diversity Club, which was run by my good friend. Because of that I talked to many people I wouldn't have normally.
Or if you are offiliated with a church you can see if they have a youth organization. Since I live in a big city it was an easy way for me to meet other kids who didn't go to my school.
Just remember when you talk to new people they may be just as nervous as you are. This is a skill that needs practice so even if you have awkward encounters the more you put yourself forward and strike up conversations, the easier it gets.
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