How do I prove to her I'm in it for the long haul?

A male age 41-50, anonymous writes:

So I've never asked a relationship question online, but here goes....I've been dating this girl for two years now. The first year we dated was great. I could not have been happier with another person. She was a very caring person and I would smile every time I thought about her. She was so in love with me. However, the last year has gone down hill a little because I told her I wasn't ready to move in with her a year into the relationship. It's not that I didn't want to live with her. I just wanted to take it slower than she did. I've had some really bad relationships that have caused me to second guess alot of things, unfortunately. She kind of changed because she felt I wasn't on the same timeline she was or that we didn't have enough common interests. The truth is, there are only a few things that we don't have in common, but overall we get alot great and enjoy every minute we're together. The only reservations I have about her is that she sometimes overreacts to situations and goes to the extreme. My gf is 25 and can be a little immature at times, but I figure she's young and will grow out of it (I'm 30 by the way). Friends of mine (most who haven't met her think she's a little crazy based on what I tell them about her). And we are different people, but that never seemed to matter (at least in the beginning). But the truth is, I feel in my gut like she is the right person for me. I feel happy when I'm with her, even if we're arguing about why we're not living together. I'm definitely at a time in my life when I'm ready to settle down. So I'm at a crossroad. I see her in my future, but I'm afraid that I might learn that she's not the right one for me. I need to prove to her that at this point, I see us getting married, but want to learn more about each other. I told her now that I'm ready to move in, but she thinks that I pressured her into doing it. The only thing I know is that if I lose her now, I'll feel regret over it for a long time. I love her and have never had better sex with someone. I need to somehow prove to her that I'm in it for the long haul, even if I find out down the road that we're not right for each other. What should I do? Any thoughts? THanks.

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A female reader, alishamarie08  +, writes (27 July 2009):

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