A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My hubby is so loving by heart he will not express it..he express his love n romance only during sex at night..he is super romantic during sex..but when it become morning he is angry and busy dont have time to care me..even during my periods.but he always cares and expresses his love towards his mother.how to make him love me more than his mother?
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female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (10 February 2020):
 OP it's not a competition. Loving a family member is different to loving a spouse. It may seem unfair to you but there are different kinds of love.
Wiseowle made a good point of asking whether or not the marriage was arranged or not because that's an important factor that could explain why he's behaving this way. Perhaps he doesn't love you like he should, yet, if that's the case.
Either way, I think that you should sit him down and have a conversation with him and tell him what you told us here. Talk to him. Try to get to the bottom of this because he may just be struggling with his feelings and trying to make sense of everything.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2020): He loves you both in different ways. He loves his mother as the woman who gave him life and raised him. Apparently, he is not the romantic-type of man; and fulfills his husbandly-duties as it is expected of him. His parents expect him to father a child eventually. If you didn't fall romantically in-love during your courtship, don't expect a suddenly romantic marriage.
He's hurried and grumpy in the morning (not a morning-person); which probably only means he's just heading out to work. Anticipating the traffic, crowds on the street, and a surly boss.
When he comes home and has settled-down; sit down with him. Calmly ask him why he seems angry and only cares for you during sex? He's your husband, you have to talk to him and get to know him. You have to feel comfortable talking about your marriage with him.
Was your marriage arranged for you? If it was, then time will tell. Two people just placed together may not necessarily grow affectionate towards each-other. If you ever will, that may take some time. I think you know that.
Arranged-marriages are the tradition in your country; if love comes into it, it may have to develop over time.
You don't/can't compare how someone feels about their parents, with how they feel about a spouse. It's not even remotely the same thing. It cannot be measured which means more, nor should it ever be.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (9 February 2020):
 You do know he can LOVE you both, right? It's not a competition.
He expresses "love and romance" ONLY during sex? That is because HE gets something out of it. SEX. That isn't love. And it's not that he doesn't know HOW to express love as he can obviously show and tell his mother that he cares and loves her.
Maybe YOU need to let your husband know that YOU need more affirmation of love than just through sex. Just a thought.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (9 February 2020):
 Most men love and respect their mother. The love a man has for his wife isn't the same love that he has for his mom. Why don't you try making friends with the your mother in law? It would make things much easier for you and you might learn some things along the way. Never force a man to chose between his mother and you. You won't win.
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