A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:He is 26. I am 19. We are in a serious relationship and we have gone far in our relation. But he is very much possesive and feels insecure all the time.. He puts alot of restrictions on me.. He is very much bossy.. He decides where to go, where not to go.. He decides what to eat and what not to eat.. He is vegetarian but I am non vegetarian.. But he says not to eat non veg food because he hates it.. He dosent let me talk to my guy friends.. I wanna break up with him !!! But he says he will suicide if I leave him !!! Please tell me how do i break up with him ?? Seriously I wanna break up :(I want to be freee !! Please help me...Help !!!!!!!!! Please !!!!!!!
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male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (21 July 2012):
He is trying to control you, and when he thinks you’re going to leave he uses one of the best weapons that a controlling person has: blackmail to make you too frightened of what will happen to him if you leave. Well, you’re not responsible for him, you are being emotionally abused. There isn’t a way that you can make him break it off, you’ve got to find the courage and break it off yourself. So, tell him it’s over, and get away from him.
I wish you all the very best.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2012): As horrible as this may sound, if he really wanted to kill himself, nothing will stop him. Whether you break up with him or not. He's just manipulating you and causing you emotional harm. What I would do is break up with him with a mediator, in a public place. Then file a restraining order of some kind. He might be dangerous.
Be careful 3
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A
female
reader, Vixxxy +, writes (21 July 2012):
You must leave him. My boyfriend did the same and today after so long of being married I am finding the strength to leave - he won't try suicide. My husband who was then my boyfriend tried slitting his wrist showing me signs and I gave in - but it's pure manipulation and they just know they can control you. He will try to evoke love, guilt, pity, fear and will do anything and you will have to put up a fight - I avoided the fight and gave in but you get nowhere and someday you will fight so it's best to do it sooner. He does not deserve you and he knows it. I wish you luck - gather all resources you have - your family friends and anyone you count on and make a move - in will put up a fight but as soon as he realises this is it, he will find someone else.
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A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (21 July 2012):
 And do not break up with him when you are alone together.
Either have someone with you and tell him in a public place.
Or phone him and suggest to him you are going to record the phone and ask for his permission to record the phone call and tell him that you are breaking up with him.
But do not go to his home to 'discuss the breakup'
And this might help you get out of this abusive relationship:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/the-honeymoon-stage-in-an-abusive-relationship-and.html
Because he will only get worse and more abusive with time and you do not need to be with him.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (21 July 2012):
he is manipulative and controlling and as long as he can make your life a misery he will keep on being controlling and manipulative to you.
Show the courage.
Let him know the relationship is over and then stay away from him, no matter what he says.
He is not worthy of you.
After you break up do not accept his calls.
Block him via your email
Block him from contacting you in any way,
He is not worth the misery he is heaping on you.
He will run around bad mouthing you for sometime after you break up. But eventually he will find another poor girl to manipulate, abuse and control.
Stay away from him as he is bad news
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (21 July 2012):
 He is blackmailing you emotionally with his threats of suicide. And to be honest they are just threats.. and it's not your problem.
You need to tell him that it's just not working out for you any more and that you need your space and time to think about things...
If he says "I will kill myself" you can tell him that you will have to report him to the authorities and let them deal with it and then if you really think he will do it (I doubt he will) then you can call it in. He will have to be checked out and that could take a few days.
Threatening suicide is one of the highest forms of manipulation there is. I had a husband that did that (he's an ex husband now) and I got used to it and would say "Ok" and walk away... it really stopped him cold in his tracks. They WANT you to feed into their drama. Just walk away. Be strong.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2012): Just tell him you're leaving him because you feel trapped and unhappy. There's no other choice so don't ask to start making compromises because its too late. His behaviour has gone too far and is too much to bare. By telling you he's going to commit suicide if you leave him, is just his way of making you feel guilty so you won't leave him.Its called emotional blackmail, he won't go through with it, most people don't have the b*lls to.If though by a slim chance he does, that's his choice and decision and you're not to take the blame for it.You have you're own choices and decision to make in your own best interest.Its his fault he's pushed you to this point not yours.Just do what's right for you, make your decision and stick to it.He'll move on eventually.
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A
male
reader, SensitiveBloke +, writes (21 July 2012):
 His threat to commit suicide is a way of controlling you. You need to end this unhealthy relationship now. You deserve someone who'll love you enough to not want to control you.
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