A
female
age
36-40,
*syence
writes:last month i posted a question on here about the guy i was seeing / sleeping with and how i didn't know if we were i a relationship or not [ the question is here: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/are-we-in-a-relationship-just-without-the.html ]. the ultimate outcome of it was that we weren't and that i got rid of him. except we're still friends. he is one of my best friends, and while i don't want to be rid of him completely, but i also want to rip his head off everytime i see him. it's because he cheated on me with his ex, and then waited a month to tell me because he 'didn't like lying to me' [ although he was obviously fine with it for a month! ]. i want him to know exactly how i feel without him treating me like i'm just dragging up the past for no reason, and i also want to still be his friend. so i guess, to summarise, i'm asking this:- how do i let go of this anger?- how do i let him know how i feel?thank you!
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male
reader, xray2112  +, writes (18 August 2008):
First of all, although he should never have cheated on you with ANYONE, he did tell you because he didn't like lying to you. Telling someone you've been unfaithful is very difficult and maybe it took him that long to gather up the nerve to tell you and he wasn't fine with what he'd done.
Only time will help you let go of your anger. How do you let him know how you feel? You tell him. And if you're worried about your anger when you do, then don't. You want him to know how you feel, then let him see your anger as well as hear your words. He'll know how you feel. Good luck to you dear.
A
female
reader, desirewhitefire  +, writes (18 August 2008):
 Him cheating on you happened when you two were dating. You two are no longer dating, so it's no longer an issue.
You want to stay friends with him, but you still want to make him feel like shit. That's typical behavior for someone who was hurt very much by someone they loved. However, you really REALLY need to let this go. The easiest way to do this is to stay away from him.
I know that's not what you want to here, but it's probably the only solution. He doesn't owe you an explaination for his behavior any more. He doesn't need to know how you feel because I'm sure he already knows, seeing as you two broke up. Rehashing the past isn't going to get you any where.
Take a break from being friends. I know it's going to be hard, it's very hard to let go of people that you love/loved, but it'll be good for you in the long run.
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