A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and I have been together for about 2 years, and we've been living together for the past eleven months. Most of the time, things are great - we have fun, joke around, support one another, and respect one another.But every once in a while - it's been maybe four times so far - my girlfriend will suddenly and inexplicably get really irritated and angry with me, and say she feels like everything is routine and that nothing special ever happens. I don't get this, personally; many of our days have a routine, yes, but we break the daily routine pretty often. Sometimes we try out something radically different in the bedroom; or we go out to dinner somewhere, or to the movies; or we go roller blading; or we have a movie night, or put on some music and just dance together. In fact, sometimes I feel kind of stressed out because of all this, like I have to keep thinking of new things to do to keep her from freaking out.Today, for example, she suddenly suggested we go on a trip to Paris some time before class starts again (in two weeks!), and she got really upset when I said I thought this wasn't a good idea. Now, we live in Germany, so a trip to Paris isn't per se crazy, but she's got about 30 pages worth of term papers to write and correct within the next two weeks, and we're kind of strapped for cash - and I told her as much. Still, she thinks we're too routine, and that nothing special ever happens.This has got me feeling kind of depressed. I don't know what to do - I feel under so much pressure to constantly try and think of radically non-routine things to do, yet we've got university students' budgets that keep the more interesting things out of reach, and we've got a lot of work to do besides. I try, but I just don't know what to do.
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female
reader, mizz.butterflies  +, writes (9 April 2011):
 seems like ur the "logical,educated" type of guy. she wants u to be more adventurous. yes she feels stressed because of the 30+ pages THATS WHY SHE NEEDS A BREAK.
come on ...u guys have easyjet,german wings... flying to paris is NOTHING.
better treat her like a woman and not like ur best friend.
since u already said no,do not change ur thesis.
BUT.
next week, SURPRISE her with 2 airplane tickets to paris.
She'll LOVE it !
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011): I'm also facing a similar situation. I think the important thing is to both put your studies first. However, some sort of break would be advisable when things get too much of a routine. I suggest a weekend away somewhere, take a break from the papers and relax. Could even venture out somewhere in germany for a couple of days.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2011): Ah, I can understand how she feels. But its her desire for adventure. Sometimes I get crazy ideas of running off and a life of spontaneity, but most times its because Im bored with my life. I need someone to balance me out. You balance her out, possible. Hm, Im not explaining myself well. I guess what Im trying to say is that you shouldnt feel like its your fault - its just her. It sounds like you're doing a fine job and yes maybe go along with her adventures more often, it could be a lot of fun? Good luck!
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