A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:well...umm im in a committed long distance relationship.its going to be almost 8months.i remember that the first 3months my bf used to go crazy with me.he used to text me a lot and even call.but now it seems as a dream.i know its not possible to be with him every time but he is not showing any responsibility of a boyfriend.now a days he hardly text me msgs:( only at night we talk.he doesn't wish me good morning,as he used to do earlier.he never pings me up in the day time,today his close friends were coming and they wanted to go out with my bf and they did and my bf texted me only once in the morning and now its almost 12hrs!i mean tell me is this what responsibility towards gf?dont u think he should have msged me just once.but no he didn't..we had a lot of fights before regarding this..and then he promised me that it won't happen again.but no it happened every time.i dont want a breakup but now a days i am unable to withstand it.i feel like crying..he really loves me and im his first gf..but still he doesn't bother to take pain to enquire how i am,whereas i do.plz tell how to improve this situation.i am really frustrated and depressed.
View related questions:
a break, depressed, long distance, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionya he said sorry by himself...so everythingsf9now..ne ways thanx 4 consoling me.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2010): I am also in a long distance relationship. Different countries. Very committed to each other, faithful, loyal all that good jazz, coming up 2 years now.
The thing is, in any relationship the basis is going to be communiction. In a LDR, its more so. It is important that you tell him exactly how you feel. We women have a tendincy to beat around the bush. Men need more direct questions and answers. I always find putting my feelings in an email better. My emotions dont get in the way, he doesnt have an opportunity to cut me off. Then I re read the email, and make sure that I have said everything I needed to. Ensure your BF has actualy read the email first before then talking about it. Give him time to find his solution.
There are 2 sides here. You want/need more time and attention. He needs to have his friends and time with them too. As a couple you must find the proper balance.
Try to understand his views, respect them, and give him the opportunity to see yours.
...............................
A
female
reader, BettyBoup  +, writes (16 February 2010):
 Hun, long distance relationships are hard. I'm in one myself and sometimes you feel like you're drifting apart simply because you don't see each other much, and the only contact is via phone, online or text message.When people have been together for a while as well things do tend to cool off and your boyfriend may feel that he doesn't need to contact you as much now because the honeymoon phase is over and you guys are committed.As youve already spoken about it I dont know whether more words will work unless you choose them wisely.Perhaps you could send him a few extra texts in the day and that will remind him of you. Call him unexpectedly in the day. Maybe send him a gift in the mail, something silly, just to let him know he means a lot to you and that you think of him. Unfortunately you can rarely nag a guy into changing his behaviour. It'll just make him grumpy and resentful. You might just have to accept things as they are or put some more effort in your end, or find someone else who will treat you how you want to be treated.Also have you guys met up yet? Having a date to look forward to when you will see each other, always helps to keep long distance relationships going. It can work, I've been LD with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years. I know it can be done.Good luck :)
...............................
|
