A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:She's is in a unhealthy relationship for 5 years already. She's 19 and her bf is 22. She tells me, she has broke up but patched many times with him, being emotionally hurt a lot of times in this relationship, he is very possessive and controls her, and if she never picks up his calls or never replies his text messages, he'll get mad and frustrathreatenstreatens her that he'll come under her appartment. She started to have feelings for me a year back but she tells it's hard to break up with him because her stupid heart won't be able to forget him. Sometimes, she'll hurt me by asking me to move on and say harsh things but no matter what she said, I still have a heart for her. She do realise the nature of her relationship but its hard to leave him. What should I do? I'm worried abt her
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female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (25 August 2010):
 I don't see where it's an abusive relationship? He's threatening to come to her apartment if she doesn't answer isn't abuse it's a ploy to get her to respond. Now if there is some abuse I'm missing such as emotional abuse then it's going to be very hard for her to get out of it since she already has 5 years invested. At that point you can try to tell her otherwise but you can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. I would tell her to try abuse meetings..Like group meetings where other people who have been abused come to discuss and share their stories and how they cope..and go with her for support.
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