A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Why are these girls so horrible? I'm so upset:(?I got a new job 2months ago and the girls I started with are just plain nasty.They all formed a little group immediately and left me out and that's fine with me but they just won't leave me alone.They are constantly watching me, talking about me and spreading rumours about me saying, I'm very rude, quiet, feisty and snobby and no one likes me.They tend to laugh out really loud and is so obvious they are just talking about me. They have turned 2 other ladies against me.I told my manager and she said to ignore them.I love my job and I'm very good at it and my manager loves me. I tend to keep to myself and just do my job.How do I handle these nasty girls?
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female
reader, Jayeanna  +, writes (14 July 2013):
Please do NOT go to HR ! You will make your manager look bad and then you will become,as the man in the post said, a whiner and also a liability! In other words HR will side with the manager who will do or say anything to cover her own job security for you are then dangerously close to comPlaining of hostile working conditions!
Grow up. Deal with it the way a competent good employee would. Ignore them but be polite! PS--I worked in HR for years.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2013): Is there anyway to call a group meeting? To discuss maybe what is bothering them and you and how you guys can reach a resolution?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 July 2013):
 I know it's hard, but you need to stop caring about what they do and say. BE who you are, be the good employee and let them play these high-school games, sooner or later people WILL see though it and you know what? THEY will look like morons.
Take the high road on this one.
These are ONLY people you work with, as soon as you "clock" out leave it behind you.
If you STOP reacting to this crap I think they will stop and look for someone else to bully. If it escalate, I would do like one of the aunties suggested, RECORD them with your phone if you can and THEN take it to your boss again. If she STILL don't want to do anything, I would either go above her or start looking for a new job.
It SUCKS to have a hostile work environment.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2013): You just keep being you and don't mind these childish morons .. Saying that I can understand you being put out .. Ignore them and when you pass them smile and nod your head to them I mean who cares . If they are spreading untruths then that does need to be investigated .. But you need to have information. For example if one of the person who did speak doesn't now and their reason is because someone told them something untrue . Then my advice is thus.Go to the person whom you used to speak to ask why they aren't anymore( take your phone and put it on record) if they say oo such and such said this and it's a lie then go back to your manager armed with your evidence .. As this is a form of bullying . Otherwise be polite.. Manners cost no one anything .. So be breezy and wish everyone a good morning .. No matter if you don't get on. It's called being polite. . Take care and you can of load her anytime ..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2013): You are the new kid on the block. The manager likes you and those girls are still in high-school mode. Their little clique is just school-girl foolishness to upset you and make you lose focus on what you're there for. TO WORK!
Your boss is right. Ignore them. Stop being so wimpy that a bunch of childish females keep you all wound up. You need to grow a thicker skin. Maybe they're teaching you what the real world is like, and how you still survive it all in spite of their behavior.
Do your job. When you ignore them, they began to look foolish. You're working, as they go out of their way trying to get your attention like a bunch of bratty 3-yearolds.
Be gracious, professional, and smile. If you are being snobbish, drop it. If you're being stuck up, loosen up a bit. Don't act too paranoid, or you'll make a bad impression on your boss. How you deal with your co-workers is part of the job.
When they see you don't care anymore, then one by one those girls will try to befriend you. They are putting you through the usual initiation process to establish their pecking order. You may be a very attractive female, that usually stirs a bit of controversy first off. Your newness wears off, and you will no longer be the center of attention.
So just be a little tougher and stop whining.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2013): Just be professional at all times.
Don't stoop down to their level and if things get really super unpleasant, Then it would be best if you ask help from your Hr dept. I think that's the most mature way to deal with it.
If its affecting your job then your boss should be concerned.
People at work is supposed to be professional at all times.
treat each other with respect. no matter how much you dislike the other person your working with.
After all, People are not working to make friends.
People are working to make or earn money.
Having new friends is just a bonus.
Just focus on how to be productive at work and to perform your job well.
Don't forget to pray too. Good Luck!
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