A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have feelings for someone who has previously told me they reciprocate but for various complicated reasons nothing ever came of it. We get on really well and are attracted to each other. But things have been difficult since this came out into the open. He has said nothing can happen but continues giving mixed signals, which either make me really certain that he does like me or crushed and embarrassed at thinking he would ever like me properly! We are in the same kind of friendship group and so I can't avoid him completely and this makes it hard to move on. I can see myself behaving more irrationally when he flirts with people right in front of me, for example, and I don't want this to continue forever! How can I get things back to normal, before we end up not being able to be friends at all?
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 April 2017):
 He has made it crystal clear to you that nothing is ever going to happen, now you cannot see him flirting with other girls because you still have feelings for him. I am not sure how you are going to get passed them feelings and accept nothing is going to happen, especially when you still want to be his friend. But the thing is you have crossed the friendship boundaries and am not sure you will be able to get it back.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2017): This guy has decided that he is not relationship material and is so terrified of commitment that he is hammering his sentiments home by openly flirting with other women in your group!As he gave you mixed messages I tend to think that he is just a flirt, possibly a veneer of a person and I think your best bet would be to mentally divorce yourself from him.Derelegate him into a lower category of friend something like a social buddy!When feeling undermined try to recall that early nursery rhyme that once started off as a benign criticism of an overly flirtatious king.Just in case you missed out early nursery it goes:'Georgie porgy pudding and pieKissed the girls and made them cryWhen the boys came out to playGeorgie porgy ran away!'These things were always folklore.The guy was rich and could have anything he wanted but he disappeared when the future husbands arrived!Unless of course he preferred boys to girls!So now you are acquainted with that ditty you might as well let this bloke carry on weaving his web but keep a box of tissues for your friends because you may end up being a flirt survivor.If that is set too far back in history I am fairly certain Beyonce had a few songs about why someone who wanted to use her friendship couldnt expect to keep it going once they proved that they intended just to climb the social ladder using her as rung one!
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