A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:About a year back I met the person who I really enjoyed spending time with. We started off as friends. We spend more and more time together. My feelings for her went from friends to falling for her completely. I am still married. We tried walking away from each other and stilled ended up getting in contact again. We both tried things to stay away still did not work. The thing is I do have reel deep feelings for this person. She even made plans to move away but that plan did not work out. When I am with her I am myself. We have the special click that I have with her. Does not matter in what mood we are in we can make each other days perfect. She is very strong person. She is one that you think twice before she gets way because if you do it can be the biggest mistake you make. So far she is the only person who understands me and knows who I really am. This person means the world to me. How can I get all of the strength to tell my wife my heart belongs to someone else? The funny thing of this is I have not asked or wish for this to happen. I believe this happened for reason. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2011): Just tell her that you have something serious to discuss with her and then tell her the truth.
you may want to plan in advance how to respond to several likely scenarios so you don't get so nervous you end up saying stuff you don't mean.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): I don't care how you get the "strength" to tell your wife, but you need to do it and soon. It's not fair for you to string her along and let her go on living a lie. If you have any feeling for her at all or ever had any feelings for her at all, you need to tell her. I am on the other end of this kind of thing. My husband had an emotional and physical affair with another woman. He keeps telling me he loves me but he still sees her. It's tearing me apart. I just wish he would get off his butt and decide what he really wants. To be perfectly honest though, you're probably just going through that whole new relationship excitement. You're bored in your marriage, your wife doesn't give you enough attention, etc. When men say the other woman really gets him, he means that when they are together she gives him all of her attention and makes him feel like a king. Real relationships and marriage is a lot different. When you want your woman to treat you like a king, you have to treat her like a king. Too many people get lazy and decide to move on to somebody different instead of working on what they have. We live in a disposable society where we throw things away when they outlive their usefulness and this includes marriage. Anyway, tell your wife. It will hurt her in the beginning, but it will hurt a lot less if she's able to get on with her life. Just don't be one of those jerks that hangs on to what you've got just in case the new relationship doesn't work out. That's not fair to anyone involved
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