A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I feel really angry towards my ex, even though we split up over a year ago. We were together for 2 1/2 years. He was the sweetest, loveliest man I had ever met, until he started acting really out of character. We were in a long distance relationship. Everything was working out well, until he suddenly started acting distant and having little interest in me. He complained only once towards the end of our relationship saying he was tired - he had been working several jobs so we could move in together. For my last birthday together, he couldn't come out saying he had got delayed - he used to travel for his job, and then for my birthday all I got was a text saying 'Happy Birthday'. There was no phonecall, no birthday card, no present....which, although some people would say isn't a big deal, was totally out of character and mattered to me! He had been really sweet prior to that. 2 months later he dumped me - by text! I didn't know at the time I was being dumped. I asked him if there was someone else and he never replied - I just never heard from him again.I then learnt recently that he was with another woman a matter of a few weeks after we split up and they're are still together. I felt devastated by this at the time as I feel I must have meant nothing to him at all, but am slowly coming to terms with it. What really hurts is that I gather he is planning loads of surprises for her birthday... I hate the fact that I miss him everyday in spite of the way he's treated me. It's just so wrong, yet I can't help the way I feel. I've tried dating other men, but it just hasn't worked. I go out as much as possible to take my mind off him. I also have periods of intense anger towards him at being dumped by text, not knowing I was being dumped and him giving me no reason why.I have been told that you teach people the way you should be treated and think that I must teach people that I should be treated like rubbish. Sadly, I have lost my trust in men.I don't know how to get rid of all the anger I feel inside, because the only person who is hurting in all of this is me. Does anyone have any ideas?
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male
reader, Metroncho  +, writes (26 February 2011):
I believe that the way this man has treated you is much more than disrespectful, and even if it must be hurting a lot now, I think it might be something good for you. You got rid of that insignificant man! and please take it easy and don't treat yourself too badly, for the moment I guess you won't be able too avoid deep anger,but keep in mind that there are many interesting guys out there, and it would be a pity that because of that boy you didn`t see the others!
be confident and let this bad weather pass...!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2011): You talk to someone. A professional, preferrably.
It's understandable your faith has been shaken. But not all men are douchenozzles who dump by text and cheat.
The vast majority of men are decent human beings. Not perfect of course, no one is.
But should I judge Germans negatively because some douchwangs in the 30's and 40's decided to be assholes? Does that make their entire race a bunch of backwards, racist, exterminating morons?
No.
In fact they are most insulted if you compare them to the Nazi's.
You just need to get out there and date again, giving any man the benefit of the doubt, whatever type of person they turn out to be.
Flynn 24
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