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How do I get out of this silly situation?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Cheating, Dating, Faded love, Sex, The ex-factor, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 June 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 June 2008)
A female United Kingdom, anonymous writes:

I stupidly started seeing my ex again a month ago. The reason he's my ex is because he dumped me 3 years ago for someone else. They recently split up, he finished with her, and we started meeting up again and sleeping with each other. The first time it happened i said to myself it was a one off. I wanted to use him and abuse him to hurt him like he had me 3 years ago. I also wanted to piss off his ex, who was trying to get him back, cos she'd taken him off me.

But it didnt work like that, we kept meeting up and having sex. Its only been once or twice a week but we've been texting each other every day. He's told me that he's not looking for a relationship at the moment, but still wants to meet up with me. Only now, I feel like I'm falling for him again. I met him last night, and afterwards I slept in his arms and I was so happy. Today, however, I haven't heard from him which has just brought it home to me that this is going nowhere and I'm heading for heartache again.

The worst thing is, when he dumped me for the other girl it took me months and months to get over. I never thought I would. But I did and I was so pleased with myself, I had no feelings left whatsoever for him. Now I've gone and ruined that. I know its my own silly fault. But I now need to know how to stop this thing. I dont want to tell him I've fallen for him again, I dont want him to know that. So should I just ignore him, and if he does text me shall I just ignore that too? I don't want to fall out with him, I just want to stop seeing him like I have been. So how do I do that without actually telling him? I'm so upset Ive been in tears today.

View related questions: his ex, my ex, split up, text

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008):

Sorry your in this situation, but as you know you can't let this continue and allow him to hurt you again and destroy the self esteem that you have worked so hard to build.

He's not looking for a relationship, he's looking for sex. Good!.... Simply tell him the sex was good, and he's been a good friend, but it's now time for you to move on and look for a partner to settle down and have kids with.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008):

Look, if I were you, i would definately let it go, and go on with your life like you did 3 years ago. You telling him how you feel will not make any difference since he already told you how he feels about not having a relationship. I think you would be wasting your time telling him. C'mon you havent even heard from him. "SAD but TRUE" is that he's only using you for sex...trust me he already knows how you feel about him, and thats why he thinks he can have you when ever he feels like it. Have some PRIDE and dont call him! let him find someone else to mess with!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008):

Vow, he is a selfish.....He came back and used you, however you allowed it; my only advise is:

IGNORE HIM, his calls, his messages everything;

should he rock up at your door pretend you have somebody inside with you or you are on your way out.

This guy is bad news, but I don't have to tell you,as you know this already.

Protect yourself from more hurt and humiliation.............give him the....I AM NOT AVAILABLE.

Good luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008):

Sweety, Don't start somthing, if you know you can't finish it.

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