A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Ok.I'm 16 years old. Old enough to get piercings if I want them. My parents agreed that I could get a belly bar (I've been desperate for one since I was 12) and a cartilage piercing.I thought that what is known as an 'industrial' piercing was a cartilage piercing, and asked for that at the shop I went to. I came home, my parents flipped.My Dad is now refusing to talk to me, my mom has told me that she just wants her baby girl back.I've told my mom that her baby girl is as good as dead, and she needs to accept me for who I am. I'm an 'alternative dresser'. I'm not a goth, I'm not an emo. I'm myself, and I don't like being told what I am, who I am, and what I can and can't look like. I'm individual.So now mom's going out to get me two separate bars for my ear. I found some that are plain metal bars, suitable for the holes I have. She's going to buy me gemmed bars. I am not a girly girl. I HATE all things with gems and sparkles.I just don't understand why my parents can't accept that a) I'm growing up, and b) I don't want to be a version of them.Can somebody please tell me how I can get my parents to accept me for who I am?I'm bisexual and I have had girlfriends in the past, but I'm too scared to tell them. My dad threatened to kick me out yesterday, and I'm terrified of what he'll do if he finds that out.
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female
reader, NymphoSexLover  +, writes (31 July 2011):
I will answer your question the best I can since I have been in your situation.
I am 18. I got my lip pierced days after my 18th birthday and my parents found out the next day. They disagree with all piercings (aside from ears) and tattoos. Most parents are like that. My dad got over it quick, but my mom being Christian is just now starting to get over it. It's been almost 8 months since I got it done. Every parent is different and get over things at different rates. With the piercing, all the advice I can give is to give your parents time. They will learn that it is something you did and they will eventually give in to it.
As for being bisexual, the easiest way to tell parents depends on your own mom and dad. Are they religious? If so, I learned the easiest way to find out how they will react is bringing up a friend that is bisexual to see how they act to the news. They will give their opinion on the situation whether it's their kid or not. If your mom seems to take to it well, break the news to her. If you tell her and she seems upset, tell her it's who you are and you are still the little girl she raised but you're growing up and you just happen to love girls and guys the same way. If you need it, there are plenty of sites plastered on the internet that explain bisexuality further which might help her understand. Based on what you said, I would recommend keeping it from your dad. You can only hope that your mom will understand enough to help you tell your dad together.
I've been in your position with many situations, so hit me up if you need help with anything!
A
female
reader, Ima FreAk! +, writes (31 July 2011):
 Hiyaaaa,Woooooooooooow brave enough to get piercing loooooool I ain't even got my ear pierced!!Parents are bound to get upset of the piercing and tattoos and all of that and I generally think that piercing and tattoos often get the negative end of the stick coz people are like "Ewwww" so its kinda like marmite "Love it or hate it".What you could do is have a family meeting get your parents to sit down with you and tell them how you feel. Tell them that you're not a goth you're still you and that you need to grow up. Tell them that you need them to guide you with some aspect of life and no one can live without parents. So go emo literally like spill your heart out like you ain't got a tomorrow.I think with the bisexuality don't tell your dad yet, just tell your mum, break it to your mum first not your dad coz you know what daddys are like. But get emo when you tell her mum coz it always help to understand how people feel by telling from the heart.If that doesn't work at all, to make you feel better you're parents have to accept you eventually whether it's today or in 10 years time they will have to. But during that time of acceptance don't love them any less and continue to be nice and goody girl to them.Hope my advice helps!Good luck!Lots of love,Ima FreAk!x
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