A
female
age
36-40,
*urplebear13
writes:Hey guys, me and my boyfriend have been going out for 5 years. We are both 22 years old, have part-time jobs and go to University full-time. Recently, I feel like my bf seems to care less and less about me. I know he loves me and cares for me, but he has a wierd way of showing it now. I am always the one planning the the dates, valentines day, anniversaries, writing him notes, leaving him e-mail msgs, appearing randomly at his school, surprising him at work + more but I never get a call from him saying that he wants to take me out somewhere. It's always me wanting to go out with him and arranging the plans. All he wants to do on weekends is to chill with his friends with me being there also. The weird part is, all his bestfriends are also my bestfriends so when he chills with his friends, i'm always there but I don't act like a gf. There are days where I feel sad/confused and just want someone to talk to, and when I tell him that I want to talk, he immediately calls back saying that he can't drive to see me. When one of our friends has issues dealing with their breakup, my bf is there for him 100%. Why isn't my bf always there for? Does he still love me? What should I do to get him to "care" more?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (12 April 2010):
 Stop initiating those meetings and withdraw from him and he will come chasing after you . He has taken you for granted and basking in your attentions.
Or you can tell him your feelings and make him aware that you are doing all the running around in this relationship.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (12 April 2010):
I think you need to be firmer. He's either taking you for granted, or mentally he is not ready for a girlfriend and just has you for the sake of it, rather than actually because he loves you. I think you need to have a serious chat with him and explain calmly all the things you have done here. See how he reacts. If nothing changes, then it's time to move on.
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