A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend only ever cuddles or kisses me when he wants to initiate sex. Whenever i try to talk to him about it he turns it into a joke. I'd love him to show me he loves me more because I know that he does, I'd just like some more affection. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, missmel34 +, writes (6 December 2007):
OH MY GOD!
Disregard anonymous response, how horrible.
Look, all women feel this at some time. We all know what it feels like to have your man wanting the wham bam thankyou mame.
Besides that, some people just aren't cuddly people. I'm a bit like that at times, I do love a cuddle, but then I like my own space too. Its a personal thing, nothing to do with you. Don't feel that its a sign of rejection, because quite simply it isn't. He probably isn't a touchy feely person. And secondly being a bloke, they see physical contact as SEX.......lol.
Some guys are also not comfortable with the whole public affection thing, like kissing and holding hands out and about.
The thing is sweetie, sometimes as relationships develop they aren't all smoochy anymore. I've been with my guy now for 2 years, and we don't smooch as much as we used to...thats natural.
Tell him you need a good passionate kiss and cuddle everyday to keep you a happy chappy. I do that with my man, I make it light hearted, but still he knows its something I need and expect.
Relax, don't take it personally.
A
female
reader, maggie1987 +, writes (6 December 2007):
well start by telling your boyfreind that this is important and its not a joke because its affecting your relationship. tell him how u feel and that you'd like a bit more affection from him because you are feeling a bit used as he only cuddles you to initiate sex. maybe he will show more love and affection but some people arent always affecionate it may just be the way he is but also not intending to be that way all you can do is ask im sure hell listen
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2007): Yeah, I know what you mean. I was like that with my first wife. Shotgun wedding, and she was bloody ugly, so it was ok for a cuddle when the lights were out or if I was feeling horny, thinking of some other piece of totty with my eyes shut.
Maybe it's just a case of him not feeling 'manly' by showing affection.
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